I stumbled across the blog of a guy named Nathan Bradfield. He says his articles are also posted at Stop the ACLU. He calls his blog “Church and State”, as in he thinks they should be one and the same. A recent article he wrote is called Using Tax Dollars to Fund Immoral Actions. Let’s see what he wrote:

Ever since last November’s elections, which resulted in a pro-abortion leadership in both the U.S. House of Representatives and the U.S. Senate, national abortion groups have boldly pushed an agenda of death—forcing taxpayers to pay for it! In 2005 Planned Parenthood got $272 million in our taxes, twice the money it made from its 255,000 abortions that year.

I’m not even going to bother with this paragraph other than to say that almost every phrase is a mischaracterization of the facts.

Abortion is murder and immoral.

“Immoral” is a personal opinion, so Nathan is entitled to use it. “Murder” has a legal definition. Abortion is not murder in the eyes of the law, so he is overreaching here.

Since it was made legal and uses tax dollars to fund it, translates into government-funded murder.

Well that just isn’t a sentence. I think he means “…[abortion] translates into government-funded murder.” We’ve already rejected the murder label, so this argument collapses as well.

Not only is Planned Parenthood being reimbursed for child-killing…

Really, Nathan? Name one child they’ve killed. You can’t, because they don’t! They do abort fetuses, but those aren’t children.

Notice a trend here? This is typical of the fundies. They keep redefining words to fit their purposes. You can’t do that!

…they are making huge profits, 100%, off these innocent children’s deaths.

I’m not sure what that means. I know what he’s doing, however. He’s trying to paint Planned Parenthood as a business whose product is child murder. The more children they murder, the more profitable they become. This is hogwash, of course. Planned Parenthood is a non-profit organization whose job is to help women plan and manage their fertility and reproduction.

When conservatives argue that taxpayer money should not be used to fund immoral actions, such as abortion, they counter that because they disagree with the War on Terror, their taxpayer dollars should not be used to fund that.

Umm, Nathan? Who are “they” and “their” that you are referring to? You put those words in italics, so I have to assume this is some sort of fundie code, just like “activist judges” is fundie code for judges who rule against fundies.

This argument could not be more inaccurate. It’s comparing apples to pimples.

Gross, Nathan! We know fundies are the assholes of America, and you’re the pimple on the asshole, but you shouldn’t brag about it!

Reason: Abortion is a moral issue turned political by liberals. The War on Terror is a political issue turned moral by liberals.

Actually, it’s the fundies who made abortion political. If you’d just accept the ruling of the Supreme Court and shut the hell up; if you’d stop pushing for laws to circumvent the Constitution and the courts; if you’d stop using abortion as the litmus test for all politicians and political appointees, then it wouldn’t be a political issue.

Second, the War on Terror isn’t a “political issue turned moral by liberals”. Whether to go to war is political. A “war on terror”, if such a thing were possible, is also a political issue. The only thing immoral is the specific actions of that war, such as torture, indefinite detainment, and of course the waging of a specific war (Iraq) that had nothing to do with terrorism in the first place.

This is not a new trick by the Democratic Democrat party.

Don’t ask me why he did that strikethrough. I’m just reprinting what he wrote.

They did it to pass Roe v. Wade,…

You aren’t very bright, are you Nathan? Let me say this slowly and clearly: The Democrats didn’t “pass” Roe v. Wade. No one did! It was a court decision! You see, there are three branches of government: Executive, Legislative, and Judicial. Look it up.

…they use it to push for homosexual marriage,…

What? No scare quotes around “marriage”? You fundies are starting to slip!

…and child-murder laws today are no exception.

How so? The only child-murder laws I’m aware of make it a crime to kill children.

But not even Sean Penn, Cindy Sheehan, or flip-flopping Hillary can argue that conservatives have doubled their money on the War on Terror.

You guys must really hate Hillary Clinton. You won’t shut up about her, and you’ll drag her name into every rant, no matter how far afield.

I think the “[doubling] their money” phrase is a reference to his comment above about Planned Parenthood making profits of 100% by killing children, a claim that we’ve already rejected as befuddled and incoherent.

As far as his claim that no one can argue that “conservatives have doubled their money on the War on Terror”, he’s absolutely right. Conservatives haven’t doubled their profits. They’ve tripled, quadrupled, and in some cases increased their profits 10-fold, 20-fold, or more.

The regular defense contractors, who make equipment and munitions, are doing very good business indeed. What’s sickening, though, are the likes of Haliburton and similar Bush buddies whose profits are astronomical.

The War in Iraq could reach costs in excess of $1 trillion, though keep in mind this figure is from the liberal PMSNBC.

I don’t know what “the liberal PMSNBC” is. That figure can’t be far wrong, however. Right now, Congress and the President are locked in a showdown over a $120 billion appropriations bill for the war. That’s just one bill. This war will continue to need comparable amounts on a regular basis until it’s over.

But since the War on Terror is actually a political issue, tax dollars should be spent for our nation’s safety without complaint.

He may have a point, but the War in Iraq has nothing to do with protecting us from terrorism.

Abortion, on the other hand, is a true moral issue and tax dollars used to fund such immoral actions deserve protest.

But we’ve already established that the War in Iraq is a moral issue. Therefore, by his own logic, it is proper to protest the war, even though he claimed earlier in his article that it isn’t.

But hey, since you can’t put a price on a baby’s life, you can’t divide the total cost of the War on Terror by each American soldier who died either. Let’s remember to compare apples to apples here.

That’s a relief. I was afraid for a moment that he wanted to compare ass pimples again.

So let’s look at lives by war compared to lives aborted now, shall we?

Shall we? Shall we? Yes! We shall!

- Revolutionary War - 4,435 deaths.
- Civil War (both sides) - 498,332 deaths.
- World War I - 116,708 deaths.
- World War II - 407,316 deaths.
- Korea - 25,604 deaths.
- Vietnam - 58,168 deaths.
TOTAL - 1,110,563

But we can’t forget both wars in Iraq. Let’s bump our total up by another 20,000 for those and to silence any whimpering over death count discrepencies.[sic]

That puts us at 1,130,563 for ALL of our nation’s wars.

No it doesn’t, retard! You left off the War of 1812, the Mexican war, the Spanish-American war, and a host of others. These additional wars don’t hugely affect his total, but how are we supposed to believe anything this guy says if he’s this ignorant of history?

Our total aborted number:

- 35,000,000

Hey, Nathan! I thought you didn’t want to compare apples to your ass pimples? That’s exactly what you’re doing here.
1. Not all of those wars were “immoral”.
2. You can’t compare the death of a live human being with the removal of a non-viable mass of tissue. Have you ever had a cyst removed? Maybe a wart? Ever peel off a scab? MURDERER!

I am merely pointing out the hypocricy [sic] of the left that utilizes its advantages in the liberal media,…

Like Fox News? Like most of CNN and MSNBC? Like 99% of A.M. talk radio?

…the far left Hollywood that isn’t used to having to think for themselves because they always use a script (who is writing theirs now???),…

Help! I’m afraid of Rob Reiner! I’m afraid of Meathead!

…and their flip-flopping politicians…

All politicians “flip-flop”, the reich right at least as much as the left. Flip-flopping is just another baseless Republican talking point.

…to protest and whine about our “poor soldiers” having to “fight in a war they don’t agree with” (all two of them)…

Really, Nathan? Where did you come up with that figure? Did you squeeze your ass pimple and that’s what popped out? I’ve got news for you. It’s a lot more than that.

…all the while, more babies were murdered in 5 months in 2005 than have been killed since we began the War in Iraq.

To quote the fundies’ (in fact, all conservatives’) favorite president, Ronald Reagan: “There you go again!”

Abortions aren’t murder. The War in Iraq has nothing to do with terrorism (except for creating more of it by pissing off and radicalizing Muslims). You can’t compare the two.

I guess calling a spade a spade has never been the strong suit for Democrats, no pun intended.

If only Nathan were capable of calling a spade a spade.

Their “card tricks” will only last so long and they’ll have to find more creative ways to lie to the American people or they’ll sacrifice their power.

Now we come to the irony. You can’t have a fundie rant without irony. It is the Bush mis-administration that has been lying to the American public for six years in an attempt to retain power.

Poor ass-pimple Nathan. His arguments shrivel under the Clearasil of logic.

I was looking around the website of One News Now, which is one of the major fundie “news” sites. Right there on the front page, I saw that they had a link to Persecution News! That’s right. The fundies are so convinced they’re being persecuted that they have devoted an entire section of their website to it.

I went to that page. They have 22 articles spanning the last three months. Most of the articles are about Christian persecution in China and North Korea (To clarify, that’s persecution of Christians, not persecution by Christians. Considering their track record, you can be excused if you thought it meant the latter.), with a smattering of other countries thrown in. Not one of those articles is about persecution of Christians within the U.S.!

The next time you hear the fundies whining about some supposed slight, just remember that their own data shows they aren’t being persecuted here.

The American Atheists have issued a press release, Cross Victory:

A federal court ruled Tuesday that the city of Starke, Fla. violated the federal and state constitutions by placing and maintaining a metal Christian cross on top of a municipal water tower.

A resident of the town, aided by American Atheists and represented by attorney Frank Shooster, challenged the display which had been erected over 30 years ago at the behest of local officials, and was illuminated at night. The cross was also periodically maintained at public expense.

U.S. District Court Judge John H. Moore, II found for the plaintiffs, and dismissed several arguments devised by the City. […] He added in his written opinion:

“The display of the Cross on the water tower has the unconstitutional effect of advancing, affirming, or otherwise validating Christianity … To the objective observer, the combination of the words ‘STARKE’ and the Cross on the water tower clearly communicates the City’s endorsement of Christianity…”

I’m glad the Constitution prevailed in this case, but why do we have to fight this battle over and over, in every city in the country? A cross erected on city property and maintained at city expense is clearly a violation of the First Amendment. Why do these pinheads keep wasting taxpayer dollars with actions that are clearly unconstitutional and that they will have to defend (unsuccessfully) in court?

BTW, I searched a bunch of fundie news and opinion sites, but I was unable to find any coverage of this issue by the fundie press. Hmm… I guess they only like to trumpet their successes. If they don’t talk about their losses in these types of cases, then maybe you won’t realize how many there are.

As a follow-up to my article about Wikipedia and Conservapedia, here’s an article from MSNBC, The Word on Wikipedia: Trust but Verify.

The gist of the article is that there are some flaws in the Wikipedia model. I discussed that in my post, so there is nothing new there.

The article does contain the surprising fact that a lot of college students were using Wikipedia as an original source for their research papers! What has become of higher education? Encyclopedias should only be used for reports by grade-schoolers.

When I was in college, they emphasized that you couldn’t use secondary sources like encyclopedias. You had to go to primary sources, like real books.

Anyway, my original point still stands: Try to assess the reliability of everything you read, whether it’s from the Left, Right, Center, or outer space (that last one would mostly apply to Scientology).

I came across this post at Scientia Natura: Paleontologists Discover New Mammal from Mesozoic Era. It discusses the discovery of a new mammal, Yanoconodon allini.

The new mammal, documented in the March 15 issue of the journal Nature, provides first-hand evidence of early evolution of the mammalian middle ear—one of the most important features for all modern mammals.

So here’s just one piece of evidence that shows a complex organ evolving. Hear that, creationists? Oh wait. They don’t believe in evolution, so maybe their ears haven’t finished evolving.

Taxonomy is the science of classifying organisms. It’s how you end up with the scientific names for things, such as Canis lupus for the gray wolf, Desmodus rotundus for the common vampire bat, and Homo retardus for the fundie.

(BTW, the major levels are Kingdom, Phylum (for animals, but “Division” for plants and fungi), Class, Order, Family, Genus, and Species. When I was in school, they tried to tell us that the best way to remember this was with the mnemonic “Kings Play Chess On Fine-Grain Sand.” I thought that was a pretty crappy mnemonic that would be too hard to remember. I came up with a better one, which I use to this day: “Kinky Prostitutes Came Over For Group Sex.” Teach it to your kids!)

Here’s a weird fact that I never knew, but once you think about it, it would have to exist: Fundies don’t use our taxonomy. They can’t, because real (i.e., scientific) taxonomy is based on evolution. Instead, fundies use their own invention to describe the relationships among organisms: Baraminology.

Well, if you want to learn about Baraminology, the thing to do is go to the source: Conservapedia! Let’s “educate” ourselves by looking at their article on this subject:

Baraminology is the study of baramins, also known by the Biblical term kinds.

OOO!! “Kinds”! That’s so scientific!

A baramin is a lineage of earthly life which is believed by creationists to be created by God during the Creation Week…

Isn’t that on the Discovery Channel, right after Shark Week?

…and corresponds in some functional aspects to the secular concept of species. However, unlike species concepts that are based on Darwinian thinking, the baraminic barrier is inviolable, as baramins do not change into other baramins.

Because that would be evolution, and we all know that evolution is an atheist conspiracy.

The term baramin was coined in 1941 by Frank Marsh from the Hebrew words bara (create) and min (kind).

It was resurrected in 1990 by Kurt Wise for use as the unit of creation in his discontinuous biosystematical system. From this came the term baraminology.

What I find amazing is that they didn’t start using this until 1990. What did they do before that? Did they just use the scientific taxonomy? It also shows how active the creationists are these days. This isn’t some relic left over from the Dark Ages. Gangs of creationists are roaming the streets today thinking up stuff like this.

That same year at the Second International Conference on Creationism in Pittsburgh…

You mean there’s been more than one creationism conference? Since that was 1990, that could only mean that they’ve held many since then! (every four years, to be exact)

…Walter ReMine introduced additional sub-terms to help clarify baraminological discourse: holobaramin, monobaramin, apobaramin, and polybaramin.

Well, it must be a science now! They have lots of big words that nobody can pronounce!

Holobaramin: A Holobaramin is a grouping that contains all organisms related by descent, not excluding any. For example, Humans are a holobaramin, but a group containing only Caucasians and Negroes is not a holobaramin since it excludes Mongoloids and other races.

Holy crap! These retards are still using the long-discredited concept of “race”! Well, what do you expect from people who think that the Earth is only 6000 years old?

Race is a folk taxonomy. Trying to lump the full human genetic diversity into three arbitrary categories based on just a few superficial physical characteristics is ludicrous at best, and suffers from ulterior motives at worst. (For more about race, read this article.)

Another example would be Dogs, which is a holobaramin since wolves, coyotes, domesticated dogs and other canids are all descended from two individuals taken aboard the Ark, and there are no other creatures that are genetically continuous with them. This term is synonymous with the use of “baramin” above and is the primary term in baraminology.

This is the crux of it. This is the whole reason the fundies need their own classification system. They have to justify how everything is somehow connected to one of their favorite fantasies, the Flood.

It also shows the only form of evolution that fundies will cop to. Dogs can evolve from wolves (but then why are there still wolves?!), but that’s as far as it goes. I’m amazed that they even accept that much.

Monobaramin: A monobaramin is an ad hoc group of organisms who share common descent. Caucasians and Negros are a monobaramin….

They’re still stuck on the race thing. And which is it: “Negroes” or “Negros”? They’ve spelled it both ways in this article. I guess if your science is sloppy, your spelling can be too.

Apobaramin: An apobaramin is a group of holobaramins. Humans and Dogs are an apobaramin since both members are holobaramins. A group containing Negros and wolves is not an apobaramin since both members are monobaramins.

Don’t forget to use that other archaic term. If it’s one black woman and a wolf, you’re supposed to say “A negress and a wolf.”

Polybaramin: A polybaramin is an ad hoc group of organisms where at least one of the members must not be a holobaramin and must be unrelated to any or all of the others. For example: Humans, wolves and a duck are a polybaraminic group. This term is useful for describing such hodgepodge mixtures of creatures.

This is a drinking game, isn’t it? Every time you add another arbitrary term, you have to take a drink and repeat the whole list.

Archaebaramin: An archaebaramin is the originally-created individual(s) of a given holobaramin. For instance, Adam and Eve form the archaebaramin of the holobaramin of Humanity.

No. Adam and Eve form the fairy story of Humanity.

Neobaramin & Paleobaramin: A neobaramin is the living population of a given holobaramin, whereas a paleobaramin represents older forms of a given holobaramin.

Slow down! I’m drunk already!

Neobaramins have undergone genetic degradation from their perfectly created forms (archaebaramin) and so may differ from their paleobaramins in notable ways.

How convenient. Did you make this up to get God off the hook for Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s, diabetes, etc.?

For example, the neobaramin of Humanity has a much shorter lifespan and greater prevalence of genetic diseases than the Human paleobaramin

You did! You just made that up to bury the inconvenient fact that your “God” created a flawed organism!

i.e. Adam lived for 930 years…

No he didn’t. You’re making an assertion here. Back it up.
1. Prove that Adam even existed.
2. Prove that he lived 930 years.

By the way, the correct Latin term to use in this situation is e.g., not i.e. If you can’t even get that right, how am I supposed to believe that you’ve gotten anything else correct in this article?

…and his children could interbreed without fear of deformity.

Aha! They admit it! It’s something that a lot of fundies hem and haw over. Whom did A&E’s spawn marry? They could only marry each other! (sick bastards!) So now they’ve invented yet another excuse to explain how that was possible! They have to keep inventing lies, each one to cover a flaw in the last lie.

There was a passing reference to “Wisdom Booklets” in my last post. I was curious to find out more, so I embarked upon an internet quest. It took about a minute. Quests today just don’t have the same epic quality as quests of yore.

Wisdom Booklets are teaching materials for home-schoolers. They purport to teach all subjects, but with a Biblical slant. They’re published by a company called Advanced Training Institute International. Here’s a screenshot of their masthead:

OK. Nothing unusual there. Then I looked in the sidebar. Imagine my surprise when I saw a link to “Bill Got Hard”!

This is a fundie web site? I get spam with titles like that! Needless to say, I clicked the link:

Those assholes! It’s not a porn site! It’s some douche named Bill Gothard!

Do these fundies have tiny brains? The link description isn’t supposed to be the actual URL! The text is supposed to be the name of the site that you’re linking to! Are they even aware that it’s possible to read that URL in two different ways? Pathetic little people.

Let’s return to the Duggar family, the God-fearing, Velveeta-loving fundies of Arkansas.

I’m continuing our exploration of the Duggar family web site for three reasons:
1. It’s funny.
2. It’s scary.
3. Too often, I just take a fundie email I receive and make fun of that. Those are written by fundies with an agenda. The Duggar web site is a glimpse into how a fundie family lives (albeit extreme even by fundie standards).

We last left off looking at their page called How do you make a household of 17 people run smoothly? We got through one whole paragraph last time. Let’s look at the rest of the article today.

Our daily routine begins with personal hygiene (get dressed, brush teeth, comb hair, etc…). Each older child has a younger buddy or two that they help. We eat breakfast & read Proverbs at 8:00a.m., then we ‘quick clean’ the house (older child & their buddy work together to clean their jurisdictions).

Every day the same thing! Reading Proverbs every day at breakfast sounds stifling. They should at least give the kids a break every now and then and let them read something else—like Chick Tracts!

Throughout the day we try to pickup as we go along, but naturally things tend toward disorder.

This is a perfect example of the second law of thermodynamics (increasing entropy). I’m a little surprised that the Duggars didn’t take this opportunity to attack evolution. Fundies frequently cite the second law as “proof” that evolution is impossible. They argue that evolution (increasing order) violates this law.

What their straw-grasping little brains fail to comprehend is that the second law is referring to the increase in entropy in a closed system. The fundies view the Earth as a closed system. What they overlook is that energy is entering the Earth in the form of sunlight. If you look at the Sun and Earth together as the closed system, then entropy is increasing big time. (For more about this topic, here’s one of many articles at the TalkOrigins archive.)

At 9:00a.m., the older children help their buddies with their studies in phonics, math, violin & piano (J-O-Y- Jesus first, Others second, & Yourself last!). Then the older children start their music & individual studies—math, English, spelling & typing.

Oh J-O-Y! Actually, the acronym they should use is L-O-R-D. (Looney Oppressive Religious Delusion)

We break for lunch at 12:00pm. Jill (age 13) prepares lunch & we all help cleanup.

Poor Jill! She has to make lunch for this horde all by herself? At least they don’t also stick her with the dishes.

At 1:30p.m. the little ones go down for naps (4 & under). Momma & older children are around the table at 2:00p.m. for Wisdom Booklet group studies—science, history, law, medicine.

From what I’ve been able to gather, Wisdom Booklets are booklets for fundie homeschooling. I’d love to see what passes for science in there. History probably cites the Bible for much of its content. Law is probably the thinnest pamphlet; fundies only need ten laws. Or maybe medicine is the thinnest pamphlet, consisting of only two words: “Pray hard!”

We work on one subject until we complete the study. We also review & memorize scripture, hymns & operational definitions of character qualities.

Sounds like they’ve got their own little madrasah going.

The children especially enjoy this because they make up motions to help with memorization.

One motion they might make is hands to their throats. “Help! I can’t breathe! Living here is suffocating me!”

At 4:00p.m., we break from group study to complete individual studies, otherwise this is free time.

Just don’t do anything that Jesus wouldn’t do.

We have dinner at 5:00p.m. Jana (Age 14) prepares dinner & everyone helps cleanup.

Now it’s Jana’s turn to be groomed into the perfect fundie wife. Quick! She’s running out of time! Fourteen is an old maid by Arkansas standards!

(Apologies to my Arkansas readers. Fourteen is only an old maid by Arkansas fundie standards, but that doesn’t read as well when you’re making a joke.)

We do another ‘quick clean’ of the house after dinner & then have free time.

The older boys go out to the barn for a circle jerk…

Some may still be finishing up music, seeing we have to take turns with one piano to 11 students!

I think you mean “…seeing as we have…”. I’m surprised that people who read a book that is mostly filler (“…begat… …begat… …begat… …begat… …begat… …begat…) would feel the need to chop words out of their sentences.

8:00p.m.is snack time.

Grape Kool-Aid anyone?

Then we get ready for bed (baths, brush teeth, pick out clothes for next day).

What’s to pick out? They all dress alike! Maybe they get to choose whether tomorrow they will dress like an Amish or a Mennonite.

9:00p.m. is Bible time with Daddy. This is probably our favorite time of day.

I know it would be my favorite!

Daddy reads the Bible & we discuss the passage together. We talk about the day & bring out points of how to apply what we have learned. We enjoy making up skits & acting out examples of right responses & wrong responses.

Gosh! That sure sounds like fun! It sure beats watching Desperate Housewives!

Often our little ones will fall asleep as Daddy begins Bible time…

Ahh! The Kool-Aid is beginning to work!

We have a master schedule of each family member’s responsibilities displayed on our dining room wall.

Their micromanagement of their children’s lives and thoughts knows no bounds.

For each month, we also have individual daily checklists which cover schoolwork, chores, music lessons, & personal hygiene.

Jimmy’s enema is scheduled for Wednesday at 3:00. Jill’s tampon change will occur on Thursday at 5:30…

These were designed by Daddy so we could see at a glance how each child is doing. These checklists enable us to keep our children accountable & also reward them accordingly.

And punish them accordingly, I’m sure.

We have goals, but then we have reality!

No, you’re fundies. You’re about as far removed from reality as possible.

We are learning to practice flexibility—Not setting our affections on ideas or plans which could be changed by God or others!

So what happens? God rings you up and asks you to block out three hours this afternoon?

Sometimes we have ‘Daddy Days’ when Daddy overrides the schedule and takes the children out for family time, a field trip or a service project.

I’m sure the field trips are to places like the local creationist museum.

We try to make each day fun. Everyday is an exciting adventure!

No. Your days sound like repetitive, stifling bores.

It’s a good thing I don’t believe in Hell. I’d be worried that my punishment for this snarky blog would be reincarnation into this family.

Update (August 8, 2007):

Most of you reading this are coming from various places around the web where the link to this article has been posted. I appreciate the additional traffic, and I respect the fact that many of you hold very different opinions than I do.

Many people have commented that they like the Duggars and/or don’t think I have any right to criticize them. Whether you like them is entirely your choice. I do have the right to criticize them, because they have gone public with their lifestyle.

I have written a more recent article that explains why families like this are a problem. I invite you to read it: The Duggars—Parasites of Science.

(BTW, they don’t pay any property tax on that giant house of theirs. They had it declared a church. You’re subsidizing their lifestyle.)

Update (August 8, 2008):

It has now been a year since I last updated this article, and a year-and-a-half since it was originally written. I have now closed off the comments for this article. I think most of what anybody can say about the Duggars has already been said (many times over) in the 326 comments below.

Many of you have arrived here by following a link from another site. This is not an anti-Duggar web site. The several Duggar articles here are just a tiny fraction of the 400+ articles that I’ve written about the issues of science, science education, and church/state separation. You are welcome to explore the rest of the site. And don’t forget to stop off at the home page to read the fresh stuff.