Even if you don’t read my post, follow this link to read the excellent article by Republican Glenn Greenwald on the Unclaimed Territory blog. Just because somebody disagrees with the President, it doesn’t make him an enemy of the state!

When The Bay of Fundie used to be a podcast, I received an email from a listener who appreciated my criticism of the Christian fundamentalists but objected to my jabs at the Bush administration. This issue is worth discussing, especially if you have noticed similar things creeping in to some of my posts.

I am a liberal and proud of it. However, I am not Democrat-style liberal. The Democratic party and its Hollywood cronies have a very specific form of “liberalism.” It has evolved over the years to encompass the diverse collection of people who call themselves Democrats. The pillars of the party, such as affirmative action, organized labor, women’s/gay/minority/immigrant/jackalope rights, big-government welfare state, etc. are at least as much a business reality (i.e., success of and continuation of the party) as a philosophical one (i.e., what they hope to achieve).

It’s very easy for pundits on the right to take their branding irons out of the fire and burn an “L” onto somebody’s forehead. It’s an easy shorthand, but it’s frequently an oversimplification.

I sometimes oversimplify things on this website myself, but I try to restrict it to fundies and theocons, which are much narrower categories. Obviously not every fundie or theocon holds the exact same set of beliefs, and I’m not trying to imply that they do; I’m just talking about the many who do. If I slam the Republicans, I am only referring to the gang who have taken over the Republican party, not the huge number of reasonable, rational Republicans.

The right-wing pundits have done a good job of convincing many people that all “liberals” think alike. I disagree with a lot of the Democratic party’s positions. I won’t go into which I like and which I don’t, because I don’t want this site to drift too far afield. Here’s a good rule of thumb, though: If Jessie Jackson supports something, I probably don’t.

It’s also important to remember that I actually support many of the original Republican party’s beliefs, such as balanced budgets and minimal government intrusion into citizens’ private lives. The current version of the G.O.P. has been hijacked by a bunch of jack-booted thugs: neocons, fundies, and their bastard offspring, theocons.

Any Bush-bashing I do is not because I’m anti-Republican. I would love to see a return to the old-style Republican party. Then the two major parties could work out some reasonable compromises in Congress and move the country forward in a manner beneficial to all.

The Bush-bashing I do is because the neocon agenda is extremely anti-American. Except for a few Haliburton executives, almost every person in the United States, in fact almost every person in the world, will be harmed by neocon policies.

There is some overlap in the neocon and fundie agendas, but for the most part, the fundies are being used by the neocons solely for political gain. Ultimately, any fundie goals that conflict with neocon goals will be kicked overboard.

Coverage of neocons on this site is relevant, because the fundies have put the neocons in power. The fundies have sold their soul to the devil. Just as in the classic stories of unwitting fools who have done likewise, the fundies have gained a lot of wealth and power. The cost for this is larger than they imagine. Ultimately, they will gravely regret the bargain they have made.

A lot of liberals have thrown around comments that G.W. Bush is Hitler. Those comments are often funny, but they aren’t true. They are often made to get people’s attention; to wake them up about what is happening.

Know this: George W Bush is not Hitler! Nazism is a sick variation of fascism. It placed the “Aryan race” above the state. Bush, like Mussolini, is focussed on corporatism. Bush is a fascist!! Wake up and smell the (Italian) coffee! Hitler used some of Mussolini’s techniques to build Nazism, but that didn’t make him a true fascist. Now Bush is using some of Hitler’s techniques to build fascism, but that doesn’t make him a Nazi.

The Italians got their trains running on time, at the expense of their democracy. We’re not even getting that. We’ve traded our democracy for an illusion of protection from terrorists.

My country went to fascism, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.

Further Reading

A slightly different perspective: Are the Republicans really Nazis?

Don’t forget to read the article I mentioned at the top.

In a previous column, I mentioned a documentary that I had seen about Noah’s [F]arc[e], and how much I enjoyed its shredding of that fantasy. I thought it was on the History Channel, because 95% of the documentaries I watch are on that network.

Looking through the upcoming shows, I see that the Discovery Channel has a 2004 documentary on Noah’s Ark scheduled for Feb. 26 at noon (this is the only showing listed). This might have been the documentary I saw; I just misremembered where. If it is, I strongly urge you to tune in.

The National Geographic Channel has a pretty good series called Science of the Bible. They use archaeology and other scientific techniques to try to find out more about what really happened back then. It airs Wednesday nights at 7 and 10 PM, as well as a few oddball times that they can’t fill with infomercials.

I had also mentioned the History Channel’s “Bible Code” shows and how truly awful they were. It turns out that they are part of a series called Decoding the Past. Unlike other History Channel shows that are relatively balanced, the Decoding the Past shows are more biased than Fox News. I recently watched one on alleged psychic Edgar Cayce. It gave a couple of token minutes to a skeptic, then quickly forgot everything he said and gushed about all of the so-called “predictions” Cayce made. They shouldn’t show crap like this. It just hurts their credibility.

Nevertheless, the episode of Decoding the Past scheduled for Mar. 2 at 9 PM and Mar. 3 at 1 AM is called “Secrets of the Koran.” It’s probably just as bad as the rest of the series, but my curiosity compels me to check it out.

The excellent South Park episode about Scientology is rerun on Mar. 1 at 10 PM and Mar. 2 at midnight. If you haven’t seen it, it’s required viewing! (but it doesn’t begin to scratch the surface of this crazy cult)

Other Stuff

Here are a few other things I saw in the TV listings:

If you like your demigods unspoiled, you can watch “Saints Preserved!” on the History Channel Feb. 24 at 8 AM and 2 PM. The description says that the corpses of some saints are just as supple and fresh today as when they were live, feeble old men (and women) stinking up the house so Junior was embarrassed to bring his friends over after school. OK, I’m paraphrasing. Caution: The description suggests that they’re taking an uncritical look at the subject.

The two-hour documentary “Banned from the Bible” airs on the History Channel on Feb. 24 at 9 AM and 3 PM and Mar. 4 at 8 PM and Mar. 5 at midnight. I know I’ve seen it, but I don’t remember much about it.

For those of you who like to watch religious extremists (Is there any other kind? I’m beginning to wonder.) ruin sporting events, you can watch “Munich: The Real Assassins” on the History Channel Feb. 26 at 11 PM. Then follow that a week later with “Revenge!” on the History Channel Mar. 2 at 11 PM and Mar. 3 at 3 AM.

The slightly-annoying series Declassified shows a new episode on Ayatollah Khomeini on Mar. 2 at 10 PM and Mar. 3 at 2 AM on the History Channel.

I could never get into Digging for the Truth, but I see they are going to do a show on the Holy Grail, if you’re into that sort of thing. History Channel, Mar. 3 at 8 AM and 2 PM.

The History Channel is showing a two-hour documentary from 2004 that I somehow managed to miss. Tune in Mar. 5 at 8 PM or Mar. 6 at midnight to see “Hell: The Devil’s Domain.”

As I was researching disasters, I was reminded of how prominent the date of September 11 has been. Below is a short list. The descriptions are from Wikipedia. My comments are in parentheses and italics. Don’t read too much into the coincidences. The year only has 365¼ days. A lot of things will be forced onto the same date.

The following occurred on September 11 of the year:

• 1541—Santiago, Chile, is destroyed by indigenous warriors. (This is significant mainly because of what would happen here 432 years later.)
• 1690—Expulsion order announced against the Moriscos of Valencia; beginning of the expulsion of all Spain’s Moriscos. (The Moriscos were Moors [Iberian Muslims] who had been forced to convert to Christianity. They never fully converted, so Christian intolerance and economic envy eventually got them booted out.)
• 1649—Siege of Drogheda ends: Oliver Cromwell’s English Parliamentarian troops take the town and massacre its garrison. (Protestant England massacres those nasty Catholics!)
• 1789—Alexander Hamilton is appointed as first Secretary of the Treasury. (Several years later, Hamilton would become the first of only two people ever shot by a sitting Vice President. Numerology crackpots take note: Sept. 11, 1789 Hamilton appointed Secretary of Treasury. July 11, 1804 V.P. Aaron Burr guns down Alexander Hamilton. Feb. 11, 2006 V.P. Dick Cheney guns down Harry Whittington. Creepy!)
  
• 1857—The Mountain Meadows Massacre: Mormon settlers and Paiutes massacre 120 pioneers at Mountain Meadows, Utah. (Victims of religious hatred themselves, the Mormons decided that was enough justification to return the favor.)
  
• 1922—The British Mandate of Palestine begins. (Part of the perpetual mess in the Middle East. Stay away!)
• 1941—Ground broken for the construction of The Pentagon. (On the 60th anniversary of this ground-breaking, it would be struck by religious zealots.)
• 1943—World War II: start of the liquidation of the Ghettos in Minsk and Lida by the Nazis. (Nothing beats religious hatred!)
• 1955—Dedication of the first Temple of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Europe, the Bern Switzerland Temple. (On the 98th anniversary of the Mountain Meadows Massacre. For shame!)
• 1960—Young Americans for Freedom meeting at home of William F. Buckley, Jr. promulgates the Sharon Statement. (The statement reads, in part:
  

  THAT the purpose of government is to protect those freedoms through the preservation of internal order, the provision of national defense, and the administration of justice;
  THAT when government ventures beyond these rightful functions, it accumulates power, which tends to diminish order and liberty…

  So, then, why are modern Republicans all about grabbing as much power for the federal government as possible?)

• 1962—The Beatles record their debut single, “Love Me Do.” (Not religious hatred, but hatred must be involved. Why else would they inflict this upon us?)
• 1965—The 1st Cavalry Division of the United States Army arrives in Vietnam. (We have to stop those Godless Commies!)
• 1970—The Ford Pinto is introduced. (9/11. Day of disasters.)
• 1971—The Egyptian Constitution becomes official. (A republic, not a theocracy! And they have a constitutional ban against religious-based parties! And they eventually made peace with Israel! Unfortunately, the country is still full of religious extremists, and the ban on religious political parties is not enforced. Still, this suggests that maybe, just maybe, the residents of the Middle East are capable of not starting WWIII.)
• 1973—A military coup in Chile headed by General Augusto Pinochet topples the democratically elected President Salvador Allende. (The United States was at least somewhat involved in this. Allende was a Socialist, which is one step short of being a Godless Commie. Colin Powell said in 2003, “With respect to your earlier comments about Chile in the 1970s and what happened with Mr. Allende, it is not a part of American history that we’re proud of.”)
• 1981—The Pee-Wee Herman Show airs as a special on HBO. (Only slightly less embarrassing than the Pinto.)
• 1987—CBS Evening News anchor Dan Rather, angry over being preempted for a tennis match, marches off the set, leaving affiliates with six minutes of an empty news desk. (Oh my God Imaginary Friend! The Liberal Media went dark for six minutes! Angels trumpeted! John Wayne rose from the dead! Ronald Reagan’s Alzheimer’s cleared up! But alas, six minutes later, the stinking Liberals regained control of our country and everything went back into the toilet.)
• 1989—The Iron Curtain opens between the communist Hungary and Austria. From Hungary thousands of East Germans throng to Austria and West Germany. (They did this, of course, only to escape their forced membership in the East German Atheist Club.)
• 1990—President George H.W. Bush delivers a nationally televised speech in which he threatens the use of force to remove Iraqi soldiers from Kuwait, which Iraq had recently invaded. (I have an idea! Let’s piss off Osama bin Laden!)
• 1992—Hurricane Iniki, one of the most damaging hurricanes in United States history during its time, devastates the State of Hawai’i, especially the islands of Kaua’i and Oahu. (The insurance companies chalk this up to an “Act of God.” The residents of Hawaii, of course, don’t blame God for the storm. However, most of the people whose lives or homes were spared were sure to give him credit for their luck! God: The Teflon deity! No blame can stick!)
• 1998—Independent counsel Kenneth Starr sends a report to the U.S. Congress accusing President Bill Clinton of 11 possible impeachable offenses. (Starr, son of a Church of Christ minister, spent four years and millions of dollars on the G.O.P.’s [God’s Own Party] witch hunt of Bill Clinton. The only thing they could prove was that Clinton lied under oath about getting an extra-marital blow job. This was a violation of some sort of decree that some charlatan carved onto a rock 6000 years ago. That was enough for impeachment! Too bad it takes a two-thirds majority in the Senate to convict. They probably couldn’t find 67 Senators who hadn’t received BJs in exchange for votes, so Clinton was acquited. Good use of taxpayers’ money, you pinheads!)
  
  (Of course the mob currently in the White House only lied us into war, outed a CIA agent, diverted billions to their cronies in no-bid contracts, and conducted illegal surveillance of American citizens [Those are just the obvious things! No need for a multi-year, multimillion-dollar investigation here!]. I’m still waiting for the impeachment on any one of those. Where is the party that was going to return integrity to the White House? Where are the so-called “values voters” now? Let’s examine what those “values” really are: Blow job or Big Brother?)
• 2001—The September 11 attacks destroy the World Trade Center in New York City, part of The Pentagon in Arlington, Virginia, and down a passenger airliner in Pennsylvania. In total, almost 3000 are killed. (Islam. Religion of peace!)
• 2005—The State of Israel officially declares an end to military rule in the Gaza Strip after 38 years of occupation. (Another hopeful sign that the two sides of this retarded tiff might be able to pull back from the brink of total world annhilation?)

I’ve always loved the sweet irony of the Family Guy theme song:

It seems today that all you see
Is violence in movies and sex on TV.
But where are those good old-fashioned values
On which we used to rely?
Lucky there’s a Family Guy…

Of course, Family Guy is one of the biggest equal-opportunity offenders on television. They’ve made fun of everybody, and the show has never displayed “those good old-fashioned values.” Maybe that’s why it’s so funny.

You might remember our good friend Bill Johnson (I wonder if good ol’ BJ drives a Hummer. And does a fundie’s tongue burst into flames if he asks for one? “No! I meant the SUV!”) of the so-called American Decency Association. He’s not satisfied that his minions have successfully stifled your freedom to choose whether to watch The Book of Daniel. Now he has decided that you can’t be allowed to watch The O.C., Grey’s Anatomy, The War at Home (but I suspect the war in Iraq has his blessing), Family Guy, and other shows that he personally has decided are “culture rotting.”

He has infected my inbox with his own rot, a letter he wants me to send to H&R Block. Block, it seems, aired one commercial on the premiere episode of Daniel. They didn’t even pay for the airtime. It was a “make-good”, or a free spot that NBC gave them to make up for a problem with an earlier ad. Nevertheless, Block caved to the pressure and made sure their commercials didn’t appear again on that show. That’s not good enough for Mr. Johnson. He’s mad that H&R Block accepted free airtime! Block got another “rise out of Johnson” by advertising on the other shows named above.

This email goes on to tell me that I can’t watch Family Guy. Here’s his complete report:

Fox’s “Family Guy” for Sunday, January 29, 2006:

Peter receives an invitation to his 25th High School Reunion. He tells Lois that he doesn’t want to go because Sunday is his Internet Porn night – the next scene you see Peter in a room full of people using the computers and he is seated at one of the computers naked and saying “Oh yeah you’re my Chinese Lois.[”]

They have Tom over for supper and Meg accidentally spills on him. Lois tells him that he should take a shower. He says that he is fine, so Lois spills more on him. While Tom is in the shower, Lois and Meg go to Stuey’s bedroom because it is beside the bathroom. Lois drills a hole in the wall to watch Tom take a shower. Meg tries to push her mom out of the way telling her that she wants to see.

I should point out that the character’s name is “Stewie,” not “Stuey,” which shows how little fundies care about accuracy. Also, the “room full of people using the computers” had a giant sign with the words “Internet cafe,” which shows how carefully they watch things. Maybe they thought that if they watched the show too closely, it would turn them away from The Lord. I bet they thought that the only way to safely view the show was by bouncing it off of a mirror, like they were looking at Medusa. In that case, we can forgive them for thinking that “efac tenretnI” was some sort of Satanic prayer.

Nevertheless, I have to object to their objection. The above summary does not sound bad at all, at least to me. I fail to see how any of that rots the brain or corrupts morals. The show doesn’t advocate Internet porn, because the Internet cafe scene shows how maladapted Peter’s behavior is. Isn’t that what the fundies want? Consequences for anti-social behavior.

Presumably the rest of that episode was OK, since they didn’t mention anything else. Well, let’s look at what else was on that episode. How about the several savage beatings that Stewie inflicted upon Brian? (Numerous blows with blunt objects, multiple gunshots, attempted drowning, and burning him alive with a flamethrower.) These were excessively violent even by my jaded standards (the fact that they were excessively funny is a separate issue). Maybe the beatings were OK, because Brian is a dog and animals don’t have souls. But what about Brian’s eventual revenge upon baby Stewie? (He threw him in front of a bus!) Sounds like child abuse to me. Oh, wait! That’s just corporal punishment and a guilty person not getting away with sin. (See? Stewie’s anti-social behavior had consequences! Lesson learned!)

This is so typical of fundies. They are so sexually repressed that anything that even hints of the dirty deed scares them. What if they see something “naughty” (like an ankle), and they enjoy it? Eternal damnation is guaranteed!

Yet somehow violence doesn’t bother them. The Passion of the Christ was one of the most violent films ever made, and they loved it. Violence is fundie porn. When normal people watch porn, the fantasize that they are the participants. Violence serves this purpose for fundies. When they watch Stewie beat Brian, they fantasize that they are Stewie, and Brian is a homosexual.

The Islamic world is in a snit right now, because a Danish newspaper published some cartoons that depict Muhammad (See Wikipedia overview or the actual cartoons). The Bay of Fundie is devoted to exposing Christian extremism. Muslim extremists are at least as dangerous, but I’ll have to leave that coverage to others.

The current uproar is a perfect example of what will happen if you let the fundies get any more powerful. We keep hearing Muslims claim that the extremists are a minority, their radical notions do not reflect the opinions of most followers of Islam, it is a peaceful religion that does not advocate violence, etc.

Why, then, are so many Muslims setting off so many bombs, crashing so many airplanes, and killing so many people (including many Muslims! And they get pissed off about the amount of collateral damage the Americans inflict in Iraq!)?

The vast majority of Muslims probably are peaceful, but they have allowed their religion to be dominated by extremists. Many non-Muslims view Islam as a terrorist religion. Islamic moderates are to blame for allowing this perception to arise, and they are doing nothing to change the situation. Complaining that a non-Muslim drew an offensive picture isn’t the way to change public misconceptions. That isn’t the cause; it’s an effect. If they want the rest of the world to view Islam as non-violent, the peaceful majority must stamp out the radical elements within their religion.

The extremists have become so emboldened that they are now trying to inflict Islamic law on non-Muslims. As Wikipedia explains, “Islamic teachings forbid the depiction of Muhammad as a measure against idolatry.” Well, guess what? That only applies to Muslims! Any religious teaching can only apply to its followers. Everybody else is exempt. But somehow the rest of the world has to get permission from some self-imposed arbiter of what is offensive.

I don’t care what your religion is or whether its ideas are crazy or sane. But don’t you dare try to force your way of life upon those who want to live differently.

Somehow it’s OK for Iranians to burn the American flag at every political rally, sporting event, and Port-a-Potty siphoning, but a Westerner can’t draw a goofy picture of Muhammad? You guys go do your thing, and we’ll do our thing. If we offend each other, well tough. It’s a great big world, and there are bound to be people in it who offend you. Get over it.

The irony of this incident, of course, is that those cartoons were to illustrate an article on self-censorship. The Muslims kind of proved its point!

Here’s an interesting bit of trivia. Right now, the Muslims are pissed-off at Europe. Keep this to yourself, or they’ll turn on us next. I was researching the Establishment Clause of the First Amendment at Wikipedia, when I read this:

It is worth noting that among the eighteen influential lawgivers depicted in the north and south friezes of Supreme Court building are three religious figures: Moses, Confucius, and Muhammad.

(Actually, Confucius is a philosopher.) What this means is that the United States government has a depiction of Muhammad on a public building. This depiction is in direct violation of Islamic law! It has been there for decades, but they never complained! Why the hell not? It seems a bit inconsistent to me, but guess what? Inconsistency is one of the hallmarks of fundies! (no matter what their stripes)

The Problem is Bigger than Just Extremists

Unfortunately, it is not just bomb-wearing Muslims who are making a stink about this. Because the extremists in the Muslim world have become so visible and vocal, they have become the thought leaders. What they say influences millions of otherwise rational Muslims. Their hatred and intolerance is slowly permeating the Islamic world. If the moderate majority don’t make a bold stand now to stamp out the cancer of extremism, it will ultimately consume their entire religion.

Just listen to what we’re hearing these days:

• “(The West/The Liberals) are trying to destroy (Islam/Christianity)!”
• “There’s a (Crusade/War) against (Islam/Christmas)!”
• “(The Jews/The Homosexuals) are trying to remove (Palestinians/God) from (Palestine/The Classroom)!”
• “(The Jews/The Jews) are making blasphemous films about (Islam/Christianity)!”
• “Mel Gibson is (A Loony/A Saint)!”

(Actually, that last one isn’t Muslims/Christians, it’s me/Christians.)

You can see where I’m going with this. Christianity risks becoming perceived as another extremist religion. Christianity has more than its fair share of wackos: Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, James Dobson, Donald Wildmon, Ralph Reed, etc. We all laugh when one of them says that Tinky Winky is gay or the CIA should assassinate Hugo Chavez.

Don’t be fooled. These people aren’t merely the jesters of Christianity. Beneath those pathetic exteriors lie devious minds. They are having more successes than failures in their attempts to destroy our civil liberties and impose their own narrow brand of hatred upon us all.

Where are the high-profile moderate Christian leaders? For every Donald Wildmon, we need ten equally-vocal priests and ministers to refute and marginalize the extremists. Don’t let the crazy ideas breathe, or they will grow. And they have been growing!

Because moderate Christians are not stopping them, the extremists have become the thought leaders of the Christian community. More and more of what they say is becoming accepted by the mainstream.

If this trend continues, I see only three paths:

1. The cancer of radical Christianity destroys Christianity itself in the same way that radical Islam appears to be destroying that religion.
2. Radical Christianity gets powerful enough to elect more Presidents and Congress-critters and put more fundies on the Supreme Court. Your rights to read what you want, watch what you want, and say what you want; your rights to free association; and your rights to keep the government out of your personal life will all be gone.
3. Radical Islam will continue its terrorist attacks on the West, prompting the government to “protect” you by taking away your rights to read what you want, watch what you want, and say what you want; your rights to free association; and your rights to keep the government out of your personal life.

All three are equally likely. (2) and (3) have the same end result, because they have the same root cause. (1) might really happen, but I suspect not before it causes (2).