BJ Apologizes

BJ.  Dildo.

BJ, left, and completely unrelated sign

This morning, I found this email from Bill Johnson waiting for me:

An update and an apology regarding Wal-Mart and yesterday’s email alert.

A special thanks to my friend Dan Iset from Parent Television Council. He wrote the following:

Actually, it’s Parents Television Council (I just verified this on the PTC website). BJ can’t even get names right! But look again. PTC spells the first word in their name without an apostrophe. It’s supposed to be Parents’ Television Council. What’s with it with fundies? Are they incapable of getting anything correct?

Anyway, here is what Dan of “Parent Television Council” wrote:

Bill,

I’m not aware of any Playboy game for Wii, and haven’t found one online anywhere. I believe what this person is referring to is videos on youtube and elsewhere of playboy models being taped while playing Wii.

Just thought you should know.

So BJ has corrected his small mistake. Now he needs to shut down his ministry to correct his biggest mistake.

8 Responses to “BJ Apologizes”

  1. Ezekiah Says:

    I find it offensive that you’d place a picture of BJ next to a sign saying dildo.

    Why malign the good name of dildos everywhere? Compared to BJ they have many redeeming qualities: they make people laugh, smile, and orgasm. Activities I somewhat doubt Bill manages to do all that frequently. Moreover, they have no interest in censorship or boycotts and they NEVER lie. (How many times have you been lied to by a dildo?)

    Why, they’re as American as the democratic way! Wholesome as apple pie and baseball.

    Shame on you, for equating the hardworking, upstanding dildos of the world with Bill Johnson!

  2. Sarah Says:

    So what would you suggest “dildo” be replaced with, Ezekiah? I’m thinking “horse’s ass” — I love the classics.

  3. Ezekiah Says:

    While indeed the horse is a noble beast (or so I’ve been told, never REALLY liked them all that much) I think the ass of a horse is appropriate; all it spews is shit, it’s not all that attractive, and you shouldn’t get too close.

  4. Kenny C Says:

    I don’t know, I’ve heard many people find the posterior of equines to be quite attractive.

    Hey, it’s what I heard…

  5. ericsan Says:

    Wanna bet sweet old BJ will eventually be found dead one day suffocated inside some bizarre S&M apparatus with a couple of dildos up his ass, like that other nutcase last year? The more they squeal like frightened virgins, the more perverted they are. The sad part is they never seem to run out of gullible, idiotic followers.

  6. Ron Britton Says:

    Ezekiah:

    Why malign the good name of dildos everywhere? … Why, they’re as American as the democratic way! Wholesome as apple pie and baseball.

    If that’s true, then why are they illegal in Texas? (Unfortunately, the video in that post has been removed.)

  7. Ron Britton Says:

    Ericsan:

    Wanna bet sweet old BJ will eventually be found dead one day suffocated inside some bizarre S&M apparatus with a couple of dildos up his ass, like that other nutcase last year?

    Actually, that was a couple of years ago. It also happens to be one of my more popular articles. It still brings in a lot of traffic. I guess that’s the nature of the internet. My analyses of cultural, scientific, or political issues barely get a trickle, but write one article about a wetsuit and a dildo and everybody visits!

    The more they squeal like frightened virgins, the more perverted they are.

    BJ claims he used to be a “porn addict”, so we know he’s suppressing a lot of urges. After all, this is the guy who gets turned on by underdressed mannequins. We can only imagine what will happen when he finally blows.

  8. Ezekiah Says:

    Please go read the amazing post: “The Texas Dildo Massacre, Or, Reason Number 2,767 Why Gay Rights Matter To Everyone” by Greta Christina to see that indeed, the hardworking Dildos of the world are welcomed even in the harshest of Texas climes. (And why straight people have us queers partially to thank!)