America, Home of the Brave. Ebay, Home of the Stupid.

Okay, this post deviates from the focus of this web site, but sometimes I can’t help myself. It is indirectly related, as I’ll explain in a moment.

I was wandering around Ebay (or “eBay” as they seem to think it’s spelled; maybe that’s a moron attractor) looking for some novelty magnets. They have a category called “Collectables”. It should be “Collectibles”, spelled with an i, not an a. Again, that’s another moron attractor, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised at what I find on the site.

They have a sub-category called “Weird Stuff”, and a sub-category under that called “Really Weird”. I didn’t see a category called “Retarded Sellers”, which is where the product belongs. Anyway, I came across the following novelty refrigerator magnet:

This is what I saw on eBay!

That’s right, the actual magnet is NOT radioactive!

Why do I feel like I’m doing Jay Leno all of a sudden? (Speaking of moron attractors!)

That’s right, folks. Here is a fun little magnet. Oh, joy! It has the radioactive symbol on it! Har har! This ought to dress up the old fridge. Wait! I can’t buy that! It’s radioactive!

Jesus F—ing Christ, people! Are you all a pack of retards? It’s a God-damned refrigerator magnet, not a piece of industrial waste! Not only that, but don’t you think there might be, oh I don’t know, dozens of laws it would violate to make, sell, and mail such a product if it were radioactive?

Morons! I’m surrounded by morons!

In the seller’s defense, I suspect that he has offered these for sale in the past and received numerous queries about the product’s half-life:

Q: “Is it safe to carry this thing in my pants pocket?”
A: “Yes, but only in your back pocket.”

But if I were the seller, I’d just throw those emails away. I wouldn’t feel right selling them the product. You shouldn’t take money from the terminally stupid.

How does this relate to the theme of this web site? Sadly, all too well. This auction is an example of the lack of critical thinking skills that permeates our society. It may be the worst mental epidemic we’ve ever faced. Far more widespread than illiteracy or innumeracy, and far more devastating in its effect.

People who cannot think critically believe in all sorts of hogwash, such as astrology, homeopathy, chiropractic, prayer, angels, miracles, and creationism.

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