OneNewsNow Readers Say the Darndest Things!

Fundie “news” site OneNewsNow allows readers to comment on their articles. Looking through those comments can be funny/scary.

Obama thumping the Bible

Obama Hates Religion!

Brian Fitzpatrick wrote an opinion piece titled “Does Barack Obama disdain religion?” The article is about this widely-reported comment of Obama’s:

It’s not surprising then they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.

Fitzpatrick thinks Barack Obama hates religion and religious people. I find that hard to believe, because Obama is one of the more thump-happy Biblers of the three candidates. I agree that his quote seems to contradict his prior statements about how important his religion is to him. I’ll leave it to others to resolve this contradiction. It’s more fun to see what the readers of OneNewsNow have to think about the issue. Here are a few choice comments left by the readers (all are anonymous):

  • Barry Obama seems to hate American and, as President, I can’t trust him not to destroy us or deliver us into the hands of foreign powers. With the exception of a few top traitors, we’ll be a nation of slaves.
  • God help us if Obama gets elected. You can say good bye to this once great nation.
  • This is just another sign that the Rapture [is] very near. Does anyone else see the path being prepared for the anti-christ’s arrival? By the time politicians and media leaders are finished feeding us their watered down versions of Christianity a one world religion will be welcomed with opened arms by those who don’t know the one true Christ.

Beware the global warming deniers

(Image from Albion Monitor)

Not That Global Warming Lie Again!

As I mentioned recently, fundies seem to embrace global warming denialism. Jim Brown wrote an opinion piece (that OneNewsNow presents as news) titled “Authors raise concerns about Bush’s new stance on ‘global warming’”. Note the scare quotes around “global warming”.

The article acts like global warming isn’t real, and it bemoans the fact that George W Bush has grudgingly set forth some weak guidelines to combat climate change. Here are a couple of reader comments:

  • I can’t believe President Bush fell for this global warming baloney. I thought he was smarter than that. Sheesh. [emphasis added]
  • Imagine trying to save the Earth from global warming. The same Earth that God is going to destroy in His own time.

Hop on the Fundie Boat

Thank God for Captain Stubing!

Steve Gallagher’s column, “Could the apostasy be upon us?”, was inspired by a Gavin MacLeod movie. Gallagher tells us about the film Time Changer. He writes:

The storyline occurs in 1890 and revolves around Bible professor Russell Carlisle, who is unwittingly transported by a time machine into modern-day America. For five days, he finds himself trapped in a wicked world to which you and I have become shamefully accustomed.

The rest of the article pretty much follows that tone. Here’s what the OneNewsNow readers have to say about it:

  • May God come quickly and put an end to the evil world filled with anti-God, anti-family homos and murdering Islamo-fascists.
  • I beleive Gallagher is right on. I pray that God will begin a great revival in this country or we will see the end of it in short time!
  • Praise GOD the end is very near.
  • Don’t just make the end times excuse to sit and do nothing while the liberals take over.

Don't waste a body like that in a marriage!

(Image from In Rare Form)

The Government Must Stop Divorce!

Another Jim Brown article is “Deterioration of families now a ‘legitimate gov’t concern,’ says activist”. Brown writes:

A new report commissioned by four policy and research groups finds that high rates of divorce and out-of-wedlock births cost American taxpayers a minimum of $112 billion annually.

Divorce definitely has a social cost, and probably a cost to the taxpayer as well. I don’t know how reputable this particular study is. What I’m more interested in is the fundie response. Let’s see what the OneNewsNow readers have to say:

  • As soon as God got pulled out of public schools it all went downhill from there. This is the consequence – if you take the light out darkness results.
  • Making divorce illegal would go a long way in stopping this!!!
  • Many “Christians” support the agenda of the Satanic left – an agenda that contributes to the problem of disentegrating families.
  • Efforts to strengthen the family will go nowhere as long as American keeps distancing itself from God and allowing the homosexual agenda to move forward.

Sucking a woman's breast

Cover Those Offensive Magazines!

Allie Martin’s article “Online petition drive asks Wal-Mart to cover offensive magazines” is about people who are offended by Cosmopolitan and other racy magazines being on display at the checkout counter. Most of the comments to this article are fairly reasonable. But there is one fundie jewel:

  • I don’t want to see this trash myself. It is immoral for anyone to look at. When younger people look at this it awakens feelings that shouldn’t be awakened until a person is married.

Post-modern classroom

Post-Modern Third-Graders Plot to Murder Teacher!

Pete Chagnon tells us “Christian educator blames post-modern mindset in plot to kill teacher”. He writes:

Christian educator Finn Laursen says the recent incident in which third-graders were caught conspiring to possibly kill their teacher highlights the need for educators to teach children the difference between right and wrong.

Here’s what the OneNewsNow readers think about that:

  • Here’s a novel concept and the only legimate reform: ‘Returning the Bible and Wisdom principles to our public school children by exercising our First Amendment Rights.’
  • I’d be interested in knowing how many of those girls were taking anti-depressant drugs, as most of the recent high-profile killers have been.
  • As long as kids are taught they’re nothing more than animals…they’re gonna act like animals.
  • The Ten Commandments belong back in the schools, along with prayers. Our children and some adult have no guideline anymore.

Make the stupid people shut up

19 Responses to “OneNewsNow Readers Say the Darndest Things!”

  1. ericsan Says:

    Everybody knows Obama is a muslim and doesn’t believe in the flag…

  2. Tom Says:

    “Everybody” of course, being 19th century fundies who tried to deny black people the vote generations ago.

  3. Hooton Hears a Whor Says:

    You know what’s sad? All of those comments sound like my parents, my father especially. It’s a miracle I’m not an alcoholic yet.

  4. Parrotlover77 Says:

    The thing about politician’s religion is that we’ll never really know the true story. Because of the fundies, politicians have to wear their religious beliefs on their sleeve. It’s very possible that Obama has only a passing moderate view of religion. As in, perhaps he genuinely wants to go to church every sunday (lots of reasonably rational people apparently do, myself excluded), but at the same time, he’s not as much of a “literalist” as he has to do in public life. If a candidate does not heavily promote their religious beliefs, they are chastised by fundies and almost-fundies as being atheists (even if they are not) and we all know how likely an atheist is to be elected president, if truthful about their faith. It’s sad, but true. It’s very possible Obama may have just “misspoke” (in the true sense of the word, not the euphamism for lying that’s the norm in politics), or he may be fudging his religious beliefs in order to help his electibility. Despite coming off as a very devote Christian, there is still misinformation about him being Muslim or an Atheist. Can you imagine if he actually was either one of those two??

    The important thing is not how the candidate is trying to appear in order to appeal to those who would never vote for somebody of a different (or no) faith, despite agreeing with all policy decision. The important thing is the policy decisions themselves.

    I’ve always maintained that a candidate can believe whatever — even that Santa Claus is their God, and he is a God of War — as long as the policy decisions they make aligns to my beliefs.

    Of course that plus even just a smallest tinge of skepticism would be icing on the cake! It will be a while before that happens, however…

  5. Brian Says:

    Thanks again, Ron, for another brain-melting glimpse into the “thoughts” of fundies. I feel like I have to take a hot shower to wash the stupid off.

    The first article about Obama was particularly interesting as just a few days ago my wife’s quite Christian aunt sent us some tripe about Obama conspiring with Raila Odinga to steal the recent election in Kenya. It went on insulting my intelligence by claiming that he is a Muslim and if he loses he will instigate a race war in America. I normally ignore things like this, but since she felt the need to pass it along to us, I have no qualms about “correcting” it and firing it back at her. I guess I won’t be invited to Thanksgiving and Christmas this year…

    I can’t believe President Bush fell for this global warming baloney. I thought he was smarter than that. Sheesh.

    Whenever I read something like this, I try to look very hard for any reason to believe that our species might survive its own stupidity, but usually fail. The only people less intelligent than our dear leader are those who associate “smart” with “President Bush” in the same thought.

  6. ericsan Says:

    I guess I won’t be invited to Thanksgiving and Christmas this year…

    Only if you called her a dumb cunt, like I would have.

  7. Angry Reptile Keeper Says:

    What’s so trashy about a woman feeding her child? What’s wrong with the world when something like that is sexualized and twisted into something dirty and worthy of shame?!

    Interesting tidbit- I remember reading someplace that America is one of the few countries that considers breasts purely sexual.

  8. LadyRavana Says:

    Ron, you are a brave, brave man.

    *stares in horror at some of the comments and shudders*

    Gyah…my brain hurts trying to wrap my mind around the “logic” of the fundies, but my poor brain cells are crying mercy, so I’m gonna stop.

    What’s disturbing is that I have some relatives that more-or-less share this view. (Irony: ALL of my immediate family are Democrats!)

    Of course…take out the politics, my relatives like to babble about the coming Rapture, and my dad (who LOVES Hillary) has actually bought the BS that Barack is Muslim!!! Seriously, WTF???

    Anyways, once again, I applaud your courage to delve into the brain-melting stupid of the Fundies.

    One thing’s for sure, I’m avoiding the HELL out of that particular website.

    I’ll continue to visit Bay of Fundies for my daily dose of snark and sarcasm, along with a healthy dose of LOGIC, backed by PROVEN FACTS. ;)

  9. LadyRavana Says:

    Got another thing to add.

    While Fundies will decry and eschew that bad, eebil “science” because it’s a product of SATAN, they certainly don’t have a problem with embracing the devil’s technology. :p

    Gods, I wish they did, so we wouldn’t have to deal with these idiots on the ‘Net. I had a grandma that called TV “the Devil’s toolbox.”

    …She was a little out there, bless her soul.

    However, I will give the Fundies credit for one thing: I do kind of admire their anti-consumerism stance. That’s not necessarily a bad thing.

    The rest? Yeah…they’re pretty much full-blown batshit. :p

    And there is a small movement of green fundies (as I believe ParrotLover has pointed out)…which is, a small step in the right direction. But hey, I think ANY improvement on their part is to be applauded.

  10. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Of course…take out the politics, my relatives like to babble about the coming Rapture, and my dad (who LOVES Hillary) has actually bought the BS that Barack is Muslim!!! Seriously, WTF???

    Heard on talk radio this morning some of the aftermath of Obama basically (finally) sealing the deal on the nomation. Several Clinton supporters called in to say they were voting for McCain because they “don’t know anything about Obama.” How you can not know anything about him nowadays, I have no idea, but I digress. I really wonder if the REAL reason is racism or religious confusion (ie, thinking Obama is Muslim). Craziness. Although I was/am admittedly an Obama supporter, I would have HAPPILY voted for Clinton versus, of all people, fundie-lover McCain! Both Clinton and Obama are very religious, but neither of them will govern by their religion. McCain is right on board with accelerating the armageddon. Not to mention the supreme court justices he would appoint. Lord… If he gets the presidency, it won’t be ten years before the bible is a required course in every classroom…

    However, I will give the Fundies credit for one thing: I do kind of admire their anti-consumerism stance. That’s not necessarily a bad thing.

    Unfortuantely, it’s all lip service. The same ones that decry excessive consumerism are driving around in their fleet of Hummer H2s and living in McMansions. It’s the same line of thought that gets us stupid TV commercials like “don’t feed the pig” (the save your money commercials) but at the same time we get checks from the government to stimulate the economy by just using it to buy-buy-buy!!! Ignoring the fact that having a job is better stimulus than, you know, a $700 check.

  11. LadyRavana Says:

    Although I was/am admittedly an Obama supporter, I would have HAPPILY voted for Clinton versus, of all people, fundie-lover McCain!

    Agreed. I may not have a whole lot of love for Clinton, but she beats McCain by a mile.

    Seriously. If he gets elected, I’m packing my bags and moving to Canada. Plus, you know, they have free universal health care. Bonus!

    Unfortunately, it’s all lip service. The same ones that decry excessive consumerism are driving around in their fleet of Hummer H2s and living in McMansions. It’s the same line of thought that gets us stupid TV commercials like “don’t feed the pig” (the save your money commercials) but at the same time we get checks from the government to stimulate the economy by just using it to buy-buy-buy!!! Ignoring the fact that having a job is better stimulus than, you know, a $700 check.

    Yeah…you know, you definitely have a point there. After posting that comment, I had a thought about those televangelists with the mega churches and the big fancy Cadillacs. Hypocritical, much? “Send us money so we can add that new addition to my mansion, I mean-Save your SOOOOOOOOUL! You will be cured of all ILLNESS! You’ll have a VIP spot in heaven!”

    You know, I always laugh when one of those televangelists gets busted for tax fraud or duping their flock. Gotta love payback. Heh.

  12. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Indeed, it amuses me too. I always am amazed at the poor saps that collapse and start convulsing on the floor after the scam artist -er- evangelist smacks their forehead and it’s all supposedly Jayzus doing the healing! The power of the mind is an amazing thing.

  13. LadyRavana Says:

    Well PL, you know…the power of suggestion and all that. :p

    It’s half-funny…and half-sad. It’s like they…I don’t know, use the placebo effect on a dangerous, massive scale.

    “Noooo, don’t seek medical attention, JEBUS will cure you and make you whole! Chemotherapy? Radiation? Dialysis? Diabetes medication? (which I take) They’re ALL tools of the devil! GOD is the answer!”

    I honestly have to wonder how many people died because of that? If that were the case, God really did answer prayers for miracle “cures” then cancer and other diseases wouldn’t exist in the first place.

    Oh, another thought: to the fundies, (well, some fundies) diseases and cancer are FROM TEH DEBIL, and yet, medical science, who works every day to counteract, and find CURES for those diseases and life-saving treatments are…FROM THE DEVIL. Talk about your contradictions.

    Whoops, I’m using logic. Can’t have that, can we?

  14. Parrotlover77 Says:

    I’m sure many have died.

    The one thing that almost makes it okay in some cases is that for some terminal people, their suffering is reduced. I mean, who am I to take away the endorphines their brain is chugging out in the last days of their life? They should be allowed to believe whatever if it makes them feel good. On the other hand, the evangelists that take the money from those poor people are absolutely dreadful.

    But then again, if only drugs were decriminalized, those very same people could just get high and not have to get suckered by the snake oil salesman…

  15. LadyRavana Says:

    Out of all those crazy comments…oddly enough, the one that sticks out to me the most, and disturbs me the most, is the one where it was said “divorce should be illegal.”

    Oh? Did this person bother to think that if divorce were made illegal, that a lot of women would suffer at the hands of their husbands? Alcoholic asshole is beating the shit out of you and the kids? Too bad, because divorce is illegal! Wife cheated on you, and you’re feeling hurt and betrayed? Too bad, divorce is illegal! Got an abusive, controlling jerk of a spouse? Guess what, there’s no escape, because divorce is ILLEGAL!

    I seriously doubt that person thought of the serious societal impact that would result, if divorce were made illegal.

    …And that migraine is starting again in my left temple. I seriously think too much about these things. Oh, well. At least I use my brain cells.

  16. Sarah Says:

    I agree with LadyRavana…that comment actually made me stop and almost laugh from the sheer ridiculousness of it and cry from my acknowledgment of reality.

    Eight months ago, after a twenty-two year long marriage, my parents divorced. Now everyone, myself included, thought that my father’s drug problems had been stifled and that after so many years together…they could last together.

    The marriage was a good long run up until the last six years (When my father cheated for the first time and then started the spiral down towards the divorce) but still…it just proves that no matter how long you are together or how much you love the other person (I know my mother still loves my father…I do too; least the man he used to be) there is always the possibility of something going wrong.

    Also, I believe that it is the Christians with the highest divorce rate in the country…they are the majority, but even if you made it down to scale with all the others, they still FAR outweigh the rest.

    As for the whole ‘out-of-wedlock pregnancies’, well gee…maybe telling people about birth control and giving them access too it might help that? We are sexual beings…kids, adults, old people (I have to admit, I threw up a bit in my mouth when I read about how most elderly couples get it on just as often as young ones…scarring mental image of my grandparents in the sack >.

  17. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Fixing the out of wedlock pregnancies and making divorce illegal seem to be contradictory goals. If you don’t want a child born out of wedlock, then you must concede that some marriages will not be out of love and are more likely to end in divorce later.

  18. Sarah Says:

    I swear…these people are supposed to be all humble towards their ‘perfect’ God, but they seem to be missing real human nature and are trying to impose their idea of perfection…which is that everyone is married, happily together and there are tons of little white Christian babies dancing in the streets (Which are all probably modeled after the Duggars)

    Is it just me or does this seem like something out of “The Giver”?

  19. LadyRavana Says:

    I swear…these people are supposed to be all humble towards their ‘perfect’ God, but they seem to be missing real human nature and are trying to impose their idea of perfection…which is that everyone is married, happily together and there are tons of little white Christian babies dancing in the streets (Which are all probably modeled after the Duggars)

    Is it just me or does this seem like something out of “The Giver”?

    Oh, give it time Sarah. I’m sure it could get to that point, should the Fundamentalists ever rule. EVERYTHING would be regulated, including breeding.

    *shuddercringe*

    Also, kind of reminds me of Ayn Rand’s “Anthem.”