It Will Be Expelled from Theaters in About a Week

Ben Stein making Expelled.

The Blue Collar Scientist has published a meta-analysis of reviews of that giant steaming turd that Ben Stein expelled from his rectum. BCS says:

In my searchings, I didn’t find any positive reviews that weren’t associated with religious or right-wing political publications — and then only two of those.

He then presents excerpts from a dozen reviews, every single one of which savages the film brutally.

The movie will do good box office this weekend, because the producers have done a good job promoting it to the folks whose logical reasoning capabilities are about as sophisticated as Wild Thing’s.

But after the first week, word of mouth from the few people who wandered into this film by mistake will kill this turkey dead.

In emails I’ve received from the promoters, they talked about how they wanted to get this film onto the list of top ten opening weekends for documentaries. I’ve lost that link, but aside from a very few high profile films (e.g., Fahrenheit 9/11), most documentaries have small opening-weekend box office. The main reason for this is that documentaries don’t start in too many theaters. Supposedly Expelled will be in 1000 theaters. They’ll be able to make their goal. The real question is how many theaters will it be in next week? Very few, I’m sure.

One Response to “It Will Be Expelled from Theaters in About a Week”

  1. Brian Says:

    I was watching something on the Discovery Channel last night, and lo and behold, there it was – an ad for “Expelled”. This from the same network that has in the past brought us “Walking with Dinosaurs” and “Walking with Cavemen”. I know, they’re out to make a profit and usually can’t be picky about who buys the advertising, but it just seemed like a gigantic “fuck you” to anyone with a brain. Perhaps I ought not read anything into it.

    In a mildly interesting aside, “Countdown with Keith Olbermann” is the only show I have watched in which primetime ads for the release of “The God Delusion” in paperback were aired. Maybe it doesn’t mean anything, but I like both Olbermann and Dawkins, so it was a nice bit of serendipity.

    I don’t see this theological snuff film doing much business, at least not on the “Fahrenheit 9/11″ level. (goddamn, I’m putting enough things in quotation marks for this post….) It certainly won’t come close to the money earned by Mel Gibson’s orgy of homoerotic sadomasochism. I suggest that any showing of this train wreck be accompanied by a mandatory viewing of the recent NOVA episode on the Dover, PA intelligent design trial. They’re always pouting and stamping their poor little feet because the notion of equal time is not being honored, so here would be their big chance to show their hypocrisy is only an illusion.

    The picture at the top of this article is a spot-on analogy for the release of this film, except for one small detail. The size of the pile of elephant shit smothering the man beneath it does not do justice to the mountain of steaming, malodorous fecal matter that is intelligent design, kind of like a grain of sand in the Sahara.