Tea Party Jesus

From Tea Party Jesus

Delaware Republican congressional candidate Glen Urquhart

BoF reader Barbara tells me that she has a new favorite web site: Tea Party Jesus. As you can tell from the above illustration, the web site brilliantly puts the very words of the brain-dead wing of the Republican party into the mouth of Jesus.

Here are my favorites just off of the first two pages. Enjoy. Then go check out the rest at Tea Party Jesus.

From Tea Party Jesus

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From Tea Party Jesus

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From Tea Party Jesus

American Fundie Association’s Bryan Fischer

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From Tea Party Jesus

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From Tea Party Jesus

“Journalist” Cliff Kincaid

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From Tea Party Jesus

Prescott Arizona city councilmean Steve Blair

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From Tea Party Jesus

South Carolina state senator Jake Knotts

19 Responses to “Tea Party Jesus”

  1. ericsan Says:

    To stay in the theme… bwahahahahahaha.

    So apparently “god” struck the jesus statue of this evangelical church and burned it down to the ground while sparing the neighboring porn store. Hilarious.

  2. Ron Britton Says:

    Ericsan:

    I know! It’s a scream! And that thing was such an eyesore, too.

    An abomination unto God

    Before

    God cleansing the abomination

    After!
  3. Jeff Eyges Says:

    Love it! Perhaps God has some taste, after all; you certainly wouldn’t infer it from the aesthetic preferences displayed by his followers. As one commenter said:

    If God hadn’t torched it, the neighbors should have.

    Unfortunately, the residue fell into the pond and now all of the fish are dead or dying.

  4. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Where is Pat Robertson proudly exclaiming how this is clear evidence that God loves double penetration porn?

  5. alex a Says:

    Unfortunately, the residue fell into the pond and now all of the fish are dead or dying.

    God must really hate fish, too.

  6. Ron Britton Says:

    Unfortunately, the residue fell into the pond and now all of the fish are dead or dying.

    But when Jesus touched the fish, shouldn’t that have just made more fish?

  7. Jeff Eyges Says:

    But when Jesus touched the fish, shouldn’t that have just made more fish?

    A Christian has to specifically request it.

  8. dvsrat Says:

    On the original Tea Party Jesus site, one has to click on the illustration to find out who originally made the statements. So I made a game of it — guess who it was, then click to find out who provided the peril of wisdom. Excluding the answers provided by Ron I did about 3 out of 4.

  9. dvsrat Says:

    As for the touchdown Jesus — someone posted the recording of the 911 call reporting the Jesusing inferno on Youtube. The caller starts by saying “I swear to god this is not a prank call.”

  10. Brian Says:

    Where is Pat Robertson proudly exclaiming how this is clear evidence that God loves double penetration porn?

    In perhaps one of the funniest ironies in all of this, a Hustler porn shop is located very close to this church. Strange how the Lord chose not to smite THAT. I’ve driven past this eyesore a few times (Its only about 40 miles down I-75 from me) and I shudder to think of the gaudy, oversized tchotchke the sheeple are going to erect in its place.

    Listening to the local NPR station on the way to work this morning, I about planted my forehead in the steering wheel as a church member was talking about how Jesus sacrificed himself (again) to save the church and keep it from going up in a blaze of glory.

    It just goes to show that Zeus has had enough of these false gods.

  11. Lindsay Says:

    Oh I was howling at Touchdown Jesus getting torched! I hope the insurance covers “Acts of God” lol!!!

  12. Jeff Eyges Says:

    Brian,

    Any chance some of the locals could petition the town not to allow it – or would they be in mortal danger for suggesting it?

  13. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Well, hopefully Zeus will burn down the next very flamable idol erected by those douches. And, so that my comment is not taken out of context, if that happens, I hope no living thing is anywhere near where they can get hurt by the “act of god.” lol it makes me giggle saying that.

  14. Brian Says:

    Jeff,

    If anyone is trying to convince these bozos not to rebuild it, I haven’t heard of it. No, this incident generated so much publicity the church can’t help but rebuild it.

    I don’t want to read anything into it, but it sure looks to me like this act of Zeus has created far more humor and mockery of that goddamned statue than it has tears and sadness on the part of Christians. It is nice to see society finally give a church the scorn it deserves.

  15. Jeff Eyges Says:

    In the comments at USA Today, even other Christians were expressing contempt (but I suppose they aren’t REAL Christians).

  16. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Jeff – The ones they disagree with never are.

    I really wish some church-going Christian would seriously bring up the idea that maybe God wasn’t happy about that statue. I know we joke about it, but I really want to see somebody discuss it seriously. It would make my damn day to read that discussion thread!!

  17. Lindsay Says:

    If you read about what materials were used in building the statue it sounded like it was always going to be one spark away from becoming a flaming pyre. I’m just too bad Zeus couldn’t get around to torching it earlier.

    Oh, and the cost of rebuilding was well into the hundreds of thousands. Seriously, wouldn’t a good Christian use that money to help the poor instead of building false idols?

  18. Bart v.d. M. Says:

    I guess the Muslims were right all along, Commandment #2 does still apply.

  19. Jeff Eyges Says:

    I just got around to going over to Tea Party Jesus. It’s a f*cking “tumblog”. They ought to be illegal. It’s maddening; there’s no way to interact like a civilized human being. They don’t have comments; they have “notes”. You have to “tweet” or “tumble”, or whatever the f*ck it is they do. I refuse to participate on principle. Either get a real blog, or get the hell off the internet.