Election Results

Mr. Owl, how many stains does it take to get to the lunatic center of the Republican Party?

One taint stain!

That’s right, Mr. Owl!

You might recall that three months ago, I discovered that some stain named Orly Taitz was running to be the Republican nominee for California Secretary of State. I hadn’t heard of her at the time, but apparently she was well known as the Queen of the Birthers.

I don’t know if anybody really thought she stood a chance. You might be curious about the election results. Here is a (only slightly-tampered-with) screen capture of the official election results page:

Losing taint stain!

I’m disappointed, but not at all surprised, that she polled as well as she did.

Actually, I am surprised. Surprised that only 25% of the Republican party is batshit insane.


As you’ll recall from my last post, I was trying to figure out whom to bless with my vote for Superintendent of Public Instruction. One of the candidates, Lydia Guitiérrez, sounded like she just might be a fundie. I searched the internet to find out more and discovered ElectionForum.org, a fundie website that was full of suggestions on how I should vote to support the fundie agenda.

I dropped by ElectionForum.org again today to see how well their recommendations fared. They still have the thumb-rating system. The more (white!) thumbs up a candidate receives, the more of a fundie they are:

Jesus was white, so we use white thumbs

To this they have added green/pink happy/sad lumps of human tissue, which I can only assume are aborted blastocysts:

Happy and sad aborted fetuses

So for example, we can scroll down to the Senate race and see what happened to their recommended candidates:

She aborted HP recently. She aborted reality a long time ago.

This shows us that on the Republican side, the candidacy of their favorite, Chuck DeVore, has now been aborted. Their abortion of a second-choice pick, Carly Fiorina, won the nomination.

California considers the race for Superintendent of Public Instruction to be “non-partisan”, so all of the candidates were lumped together. Since this is a primary election, the top-two vote-getters will compete in a run-off in November.

Lydia Guitiérrez, dangerous fundie, came in fourth (yay!), which means her opportunity to destroy California schools has passed, at least for the moment. Alarmingly, Lydia wasn’t the only fundie running for schools chief. Let’s check in with ElectionForum.org to see how they did:

No Texas State Board of Education this time around.

Abortions all the way around!

5 Responses to “Election Results”

  1. Jerad Says:

    Many of us Californians are decline to state voters… so I wouldn’t say that only 25% of the republican party is batshit insane. I’m not a republican, but cast a republican ballot.

  2. Jerad Says:

    Btw, Brian Quintana is doing some great contortionist work explaining how he really won:

  3. Smaug Says:

    Hm. An ‘Abort the Fundies’ T-shirt would be fun.

  4. Green Eagle Says:

    Actually, your reasoning is quite flawed. I am sure that many of the Republicans that voted for the other guy are batshit insane too.

  5. Chris Says:

    Green Eagle is right. California Republicans were batshit insane long, long before it was “cool”.