The Holy Trinity is Complete

I'm nailed right in!

(Images from

Another televangelist kicked the bucket yesterday. That brings us to three (that I know of) so far this year. This time it was Rex Humbard of the Cathedral of Tomorrow church and TV show. I was hoping for somebody more evil, such as James Dobson or Pat Robertson, but I guess we have to take our miracles where we can get them.

Humbard isn’t too well known these days. I’d barely heard of him myself. His biggest claim to fame is that he was one of the very first televangelists. We can blame him for showing everybody who followed how to do it.

His second-biggest claim to fame is that he officiated at Elvis Presley’s funeral.

As you can see by the image above, he specialized in using trinkets to fleece the gullible.

The images below are from another one of his campaigns. First, you receive some junk mail from Humbard. When you open it, you discover two coins inside! Don’t get too excited. One is a peso, and the other is 20 centavos! He really broke the bank for this campaign!

You’re supposed to keep the peso. Oh that’s exactly what I need. Another piece of junk cluttering up my drawers. (I wonder if it will fool the Coinstar?) Then you’re supposed to wrap the centavo in your largest bill and send it back.

It costs more to mail these than they're worth!

Read the above envelope carefully. What do you suppose a $25 bill looks like?

This next image shows why you’re supposed to send the centavo back. Apparently Humbard is going to feed it to a fish.

Gimme back my coin, fish! It belongs to the lawd!

This campaign seem crude now, but many of the cheesier televangelists are still doing stuff like this. You can thank Humbard for pioneering a lot of this junk.

3 Responses to “The Holy Trinity is Complete”

  1. Lepht Says:

    vow of poverty, schmow of poverty. wasn’t their religion supposed to be about charity?


  2. sadisticon Says:

    Holy shit.
    I can say ‘shit can’t I?

  3. Troy Says:

    I remember I sent Peter Popoff $1 to see how much stuff he’d send me. It was quite a bit. Everything from an aluminum vial of olive oil (Mixed to biblical proportions!) to a silk hanky, I think even a penny.