Conservababes Pix #3: Darwin

[I’m on vacation right now, so here is a quick post I wrote in advance. Feel free to discuss it among yourselves.]

I'm a baaaaaa'd boy!

Today we continue our look at the sub-moronic image gallery at Conservababes.

I’m not sure what they thought they were accomplishing with the above picture. I guess they’re trying to discredit Darwin. Well I, for one, am quite offended by it. It’s an outrage! That picture is extremely slanderous. Don’t believe it for a minute. I’m sure it’s Photoshopped.

Darwin never owned a motorcycle!

Next we have a scene deleted from Castaway. I’m sure the same academic thugs who expelled Jerry Bergman also pressured the studio to delete this scene:

Well their brain has gone missing anyway

This next one didn’t make any sense at all to me the first time I saw it:

This pics makes as much sense as any of them

Then I saw that the file name is “Magic Darwin”. Obviously they’re trying to imply that the only way that Darwin’s theories could work is through magic. It’s a good thing the creationists don’t believe in magical explanations.

The jet fighter puzzled me at first. Then I realized that it must represent the fundies and their relentless pursuit of their goal: Eliminating evolution from the classroom and teaching creationism instead. As you can tell from the picture, we’re outgunned.

The next picture also didn’t make sense to me the first time I saw it. Nor did it make sense the tenth time I saw it. Your guess is as good as mine:

Darwin is HOT!

Speaking of non-sensical, what’s up with this one?

Superman took down the World Trade Center?

I had to think about the next one for a moment, but then I realized that it must be a reference to the Big Bang. Because, after all, Darwin came up with that, too.

Saddam was as insane as the guy who made this picture

This next one actually makes sense, if you think about it.

It's as plain as day, but you reject the results anyway

You might remember the source picture from the hanging chad fiasco in the Florida presidential election of 2000. What this picture is telling us is that all the evidence points to evolution, so the fundies are forced to use the courts to get creationism into the schools. (And how is that working out, by the way?)

These next two pictures are unrelated. I just stuck them together to save space. Unfortunately, I can’t save your sanity the same way. If you’ve read this far, you’ve seen too much stupid already. Right now, stop reading this blog and feel your chin. If it’s wet, you’re drooling! You blew your rationality fuse! It’s too late. You’ll spend the rest of your life as a brain-dead creationist.

If you’re still with me and still want to risk a lifetime of having to listen to bad organ music, then have a look at the next two images:

Neither of these pictures makes any sense

On the left is a liger, which is a cross between a lion and a tiger. Don’t ask me why they pasted Darwin’s face on it or how this is supposed to discredit evolution.

On the right is the tired old claim that the fact that evolution exists in the natural world somehow justifies any immoral behavior you want to do. Sorry. It doesn’t work that way. If you’re looking for justification for immoral behavior, you have to turn to the Bible.

Finally, we have these last two:

Neither of these pictures makes any sense

I’m stumped. Can anyone out there figure these out?

[Come back tomorrow for some more great images from Conservababes!]

13 Responses to “Conservababes Pix #3: Darwin”

  1. Parrotlover77 Says:

    I still don’t understand the Superman one, but I do recognize the source, which eluded me at first.

    That’s the source picture for the fake picture that became famous shortly after 9/11 where it supposed to show some tourist taking a picture at the top of the WTC with a plane flying towards it in the background. I forgot what the picture actually is of (I don’t think it was even in the WTC complex, but I could be wrong).

    Anyway, if you look at that picture, you see Darwin taking the place of the tourist and Superman taking the place of the jet. So… I guess Superman is fixing to crash into the WTC and Darwin is an innocent bystander who is going to die? Maybe it’s not anti-Darwin as much as it’s a 9/11 conspiracy?

  2. 4ndyman Says:

    RE: Clinton and Darwin: That Darwin is one sexy bitch!
    RE: The liger. Maybe they mistakenly thought that crossing an animal that is a cross between a lion and a tiger would be called a lier, and hence a great place to put Darwin’s head?
    RE: The True Origin of Terrorism: That’s Karl Marx there with Darwin. Typical fundie ploy to label anything they see as “anti-American” (like atheism, political dissent, or universal health care) as Communist. I think the text in that one reveals more about the others. If they believe that terrorism really somehow stems from Darwin’s theories, then equating anything related to terrorism (like the flying carpet from Baghdad or Saddam Hussein) with Darwin is fair game. I’m guessing, from the picture, that they also believe that Marx created atheism.
    RE: The last pair of pix. I think the first one is in praise of George Bush for figuratively kicking Darwin’s ass. Somehow.
    So much ignorance in such a small space!

  3. Magnus Bergmark Says:

    Last one is obviously trying to say “True — Darwin *had* a monkey brain”

  4. TB Tabby Says:

    The liger one is hilarious because, because ligers are such compelling evidence for speciation.

  5. The Runaway lawyer Says:

    Speechless.

  6. mbx24 Says:

    What I’m wondering is, how can the fundies possibly find these at all amusing?

  7. Robert Madewell Says:

    Maybe that picture is saying that Clinton and Darwin had sax!

    It’s sure easy to make fun of a man that’s 127 years dead.

  8. Robert Madewell Says:

    What’s with this one?

    Creationism is make believe

  9. Steve Wiggins Says:

    If Creationists have to sink to corny ad hominem attacks against Darwin it demonstrates just how weak their thinking is. When did roasting a theorist ever disprove the theory? The Catholics tried it with Galileo and look where it got them.

  10. Lurker111 Says:

    The guy looking at the hanging chad looks so much like Hyacinth Bucket’s husband (Richard!) in the Brit series _Keeping Up Appearances_ that I have to laugh every time I see that photo.

  11. Jeff Eyges Says:

    What I’m wondering is, how can the fundies possibly find these at all amusing?

    Because they’re operating at the developmental level of preadolescents.

  12. Joshua Zelinsky Says:

    The level of fascination with Darwin as an individual is worth noting. This seems to be part of a general problem in that there’s a tendency by creationists to act like Darwin is some sort of religious figure and thus attacking him somehow attacks evolution. Very confusing.

    Regarding the last two images, I think the idea is that George W. Bush is going to put creationism back into our schools or something? The other one is maybe about Darwin leading on a misguided brain? Not completely sure.

  13. Bart v.d. M. Says:

    “”What I’m wondering is, how can the fundies possibly find these at all amusing?”
    Because they’re operating at the developmental level of preadolescents.”
    I don’t think scientists know the answer yet, but so far the results look promising.

    “It’s sure easy to make fun of a man that’s 127 years dead.”
    I’m not sure that has anything to do with how long he’d been dead. There’s this guy who’s 1986 years dead, and when you make fun of him a lot of people get really pissed off.