Pathetic Encore

It's just too easy

[Note: This site is still having problems, but I’m tired of dealing with it. I’ll try to fix it over the next several days. I need a break. An entertainment break. What could be more fun and reinvigorating than fisking a fundie? Nothing! Let’s go!]

You might remember back in May when some numbnuts calling himself “Prophetic Observer” visited my site and left an ignorant comment. He wasn’t content to pollute the internet just on his own blog. He felt he needed to throw some intellectual empty beer cans and fast food wrappers on the ground here as well. Why, he was practically asking to be fisked! So I did. I ridiculed him in a couple of articles (here and here), and then I thought I was done with him. After all, a cat can only have so much fun with a lame mouse. After he’s knocked unconscious, all of the joyful sadism goes out of it.

He really was knocked unconscious. He stopped blogging completely. I’m not claiming credit for that. I think the entire internet was too much for him. He deleted all of the reader comments off of his blog (“oh noes!! teh intertoobs talks back!!”). He probably spent the next four months cowering in his crazy cave, and he has just now built up enough courage to once again venture out into the wild, untamed internet, looking for souls to infect “save”.

I really was going to leave the guy alone, but I mean just look at his blog! This is why we need universal health coverage in this country. It’s so people like this can get the help they need.

The article that caught my eye is called “Microsoft Employees Heart the Mark of the Beast?” (I think he wanted to call it “Microsoft Employees ♥ the Mark of the Beast?”, but looking up a character in a table requires logic and analytical thinking. He can find stuff that isn’t in the Bible, but he can’t find a heart symbol that is on an HTML table!)

Here’s what he writes:

Just got an interesting email from a former Microsoft employee. It seems that like a growing number of companies, Microsoft issues RFID key tags to employees allowing access to certain areas. Nothing surprising there, but apparently some of the employees have taken this a step further and are voluntarily having themselves privately implanted with a VeriChip® in order to make things easier.

That is such a geeky thing to do! It’s exactly what I would expect out of engineers at a big company. There’s nothing more sinister to it than that, right now anyway.

This is not a unique situation by any means. There are many websites with people that have done this for convenience, and the “cool” factor.

OK. So far, Pathetic Observer has gone two whole paragraphs and has managed to sound almost sane. But what’s this next paragraph? It looks like we’re coming into some weather. Rain! Hallelujah! It’s fundie rain!

And he causeth all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and bond, to receive a mark in their right hand, or in their foreheads:
Revelation 13:16 (KJV)

Well we all knew that one was coming, didn’t we?

It is common knowledge that Microsoft has recently partnered with VeriChip®…

He was able to look up the registered trademark symbol, but he couldn’t find a stinking heart for his title? Maybe “King James Version” is a registered trademark of God, so he already knows the code.

…thereby linking the FDA approved LifeChip® with their “HealthVault®” medical data storage website. FDA approval of this chip erases any doubts as to it’s purpose: to be implanted in humans.

I actually don’t know anything about whether this is true or not. I would be quite upset if the government tried to tell us that we all needed to be chipped. But there’s a difference between being concerned about civil liberties and living a life of paranoid delusion. I wonder which camp Pathetic Observer is in?

The timing of this partnership is also troubling to say the least, considering the American government’s push for universal health care and centralized health records.

Yes, we are getting dangerously close to a national ID card. Maybe Pathetic Observer is more lucid than we originally thought.

And with the constant media propaganda promising Swine flu lurking in the shadows for the fall, could the subsequent massive vaccinations also serve as a widespread field test of the logistics of mass RFID implantation?

And we just took a hard right turn into Crazy Town!

And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
Matthew 5:30 (KJV®)

Some say that once a person takes this mark they will no longer desire or be able to become a Christian. But is it possible that this verse illustrates a way out for anyone that may have taken the mark out of ignorance, and subsequently desires to become a Christian?

Yes! Of course! It worked for Ray Milland!

“You see sin and the devil! But the lord has told us what to do about it. Said Matthew in Chapter Five, ‘If thine eye offends thee… pluck it out!‘”
Roger Corman 1963 (AIP)

Pluck them out!

10 Responses to “Pathetic Encore”

  1. 4ndyman Says:

    FDA approval of this chip erases any doubts as to it’s purpose: to be implanted in humans.

    FDA approval of a LifeChip that is implantable in humans is about as scary as the fact that the government allows tattoos. You can permanently decorate your skin, but you aren’t required to. In the same way, you can get a LifeChip implant, but the government can’t force you to do it. For Buddha’s sake, the government can’t even force you to vaccinate your children!

  2. Parrotlover77 Says:

    If you gazoogle VeriChip, you get all kinds of crazy conspiracy theories and satanic paranoia. Awesome.

    Personally, I never was too keen on the idea of injectable RFID chips. Not because I was concerned about privacy, but mainly because I was worried about unnecessary complications. But after reading this craziness, it makes me want to do it.

    And yea, what 4ndyman said! Nobody is requiring this! Look, I’m against a required national ID card because of some innate little “l” libertarianism in me. But we already have a de facto natoinal ID card, if you want any modern conveniences. It’s called a Driver’s Licenses. I like that they are optional, but really who doesn’t have one?

    I gotta say though… an RFID that ties into a database of my complete medical record in case I cannot speak for myself. That’s some major WIN right there for any potential ER visit you may have in the future!

  3. Robert Madewell Says:

    PO no longer allows comments on his blog. How unfortunate. I have lots of respect for christian blogs that allow comments and don’t delete the ones they don’t agree with. So, PO has gone the way of Ken Ham and others who are too afraid to confront people with other opinions. How typical!

  4. Sarah Says:

    No commenting = instant fail, IMO. You know who else doesn’t allow commenting? The Abstinence Clearinghouse Blog, they of the staggeringly dumb statements such as “When you use a condom, there’s a 50-50 chance something will go wrong, and 9 times out of 10, it does”. I AM NOT MAKING THAT UP.

  5. ericsan Says:

    Sarah, is that a Bristol Palin quote? I know she’s become the poster girl for abstinence…

  6. Sarah Says:

    Nah, that’s just the usual blithering drivel the bloggers pen over there. Most of the really insanely stupid posts are written by some idiot named “HotMama247”. I bet she’s been using that one since her AOL days.

  7. HotMama246 Says:

    Actually, Sunday is reserved for Jesus.

  8. Jeff Eyges Says:

    And he causeth all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and bond, to receive a mark in their right hand, or in their foreheads

    Maybe God is a lefty.

    have lots of respect for christian blogs that allow comments and don’t delete the ones they don’t agree with.

    And those would be… ?

  9. Parrotlover77 Says:

    HotMoma246 made me LOL.

    I had to pass on that 50/50 9/10 nugget to my facebook friends. Hillarity immediately ensued! Good stuff.

  10. Robert Madewell Says:

    Very few, Jeff. As far as I know, Ray Comfort still does. Though his “god capitalization” rule seems silly to some, it’s tolerable. Eric Hovind allows (somewhat) open comments as well, with similar capitalization rules as Ray. Also the Got Questions blog allows open comments as well. Maybe, I should come up with a list?