Teabagging with Jesus (Part 2)

Gargle afterward!

(Image from Kilburn Hall)

My time is still tight right now, so let’s do another quickie with the teabaggers. They’re looking a little down-in-the-mouth these days.

That first article got some negative comment. Some people missed the point, which is that not every teabagger fits the stereotype. (That’s the whole reason I was discussing demographics. Read the whole article next time, not just the part you want to be offended by!) One point of the article, though, is that many people do fit the profile, and if you hang out with them, there is guilt by association.

It’s completely patriotic to be opposed to high taxes, but if you kept your mouth shut during the last eight years, then you have no right to be opening it now. Patriots always speak up when the government goes astray. If you only speak up when your guy loses the election, you aren’t patriotic at all. You’re a traitor to your country. If you aren’t willing to defend the Constitution when it’s inconvenient, you don’t deserve its privileges when it is convenient, nor do you deserve its protections. Unfortunately, those of us who understand and appreciate the freedoms granted to us by the Constitution recognize that the only way to preserve those freedoms and protect that Constitution is to protect and defend your right to be a traitorous unpatriotic asshole.

So who are the teabaggers? Let’s ask them! Vjack refers us to some photos taken by one of his readers, userjack6880, at a teabagging. Here are my favorites.

A lot of them are the craziest of the crazies: Birthers!

Obama is an illegal alien! Maybe he's an actual alien!

They don’t understand the Constitution. God is not mentioned anywhere.

God wrote the Constitution?

They’re freakin’ morons when it comes to politics and science.

God and science. Always a winning pair.

They pretty much buy into any ignorant lie that Limbaugh, Hannity, Savage, and Fox News want to perpetuate. (Can anybody tell me what carbon monoxide squared is?)

Carbon monoxide squared

And, of course, they aren’t the tiniest bit racist.

Where's his watermelon?

35 Responses to “Teabagging with Jesus (Part 2)”

  1. arkonbey Says:

    Well, CO2 IS life essential… if you’re a plant.

  2. sue blue Says:

    Wow, I’ve seen fourth-graders write arguments that are more coherent and well-thought-out than the ones on those signs. You have to wonder if these folks can even read their bibles. Seems a three-letter word like “God” is about all they can manage.

    As for the CO2, I invite these chemically illiterate dorks to vacation near Lake Nyos in Cameroon, where they can take a long dirt nap the next time it belches out a big dose of carbon dioxide. The plants and vegetables loved it the last time it happened. Air-breathers – not so much.

  3. scapersteph Says:

    “CO2 is life essential” That made me laugh pretty hard. Is this a clue that they are plants? lol

  4. Mark Says:

    For more info about the organization behind the teabagger movement, Rachel Maddow has a couple of videos of what she demonstrates is a “big corporate propaganda effort.”

  5. ericsan Says:

    “CO2 is life essential” That made me laugh pretty hard. Is this a clue that they are plants? lol

    Maybe that’s why they enjoy “Veggie Tales”

  6. Bacopa Says:

    I touught they rigged Lake Nyos with some kind of pumping system that lets the CO2 outgass gradually.

    In any case, the teabaggers are an odd mix. What’s the connection between opposition to universal healthcare and denial that humans may be contributing to global warming.

    BTW, global warming is real. My argument? Banana buds! Small bananas reliably fruit in NW Houston. When I was a kid bananas fruited only down on Galveston Bay. Inca doves have been replaced by whitewings. I haven’t seen a goldfinch for many years. Loquats are ripe in March instead of April. Plants and animals tell me the earth is warming.

  7. Qualls Says:

    Birthers and the tax movement are two different issues and two different groups. Having said that, there’s probably several people who are birthers and in favor of sane taxation policy, just as I’m sure there are people who are both atheists and birthers.

    The Declaration of Independence, our nation’s “birth certificate” begins by mentioning the rights given to us by “our creator,” not by our “evolver.” Whether or not that means G-d is left as an exercise to the reader and depends upon your belief system.

    CO2 is life-essential for plants and in turn, plants provide oxygen for animals to breathe. It’s all part of the cycle of life that we’ve evolved into. Anyone who doesn’t recognize that is either being intentionally obtuse or didn’t pass primary and school biology classes.

    The caricature of President Barack Obama? He himself jokes about his big ears. Is his white half being racist toward his black half? Who knows. Only he could answer that question. Jimmy Carter’s lips have been caricatured countless times. George W. Bush was frequently caricatured as a chimp or primate. Perhaps some of you gentlebloggers have expressed hatred toward others, based upon bigotries and prejudice. To accuse others of bigotry and prejudice is the height of arrogance and hypocrisy.

  8. Ron Britton Says:

    Qualls:

    Birthers and the tax movement are two different issues and two different groups. Having said that, there’s probably several people who are birthers and in favor of sane taxation policy,

    As I point out in the article, it is more than “several”. I also question the use of “sane taxation policy”. As I also said in the article, why is the election of Obama the first time that these people decide they don’t like U.S. fiscal policy?

    The Declaration of Independence, our nation’s “birth certificate” begins by mentioning the rights given to us by “our creator,” not by our “evolver.”

    You people are really fixated on birth certificates, aren’t you? The Declaration of Independence is not the law of the land. It predates the legal entity of the United States of America by ten years. God is not in the Constitution. That’s the document we live by. Read it sometime.

    I don’t know what your point about CO2 is. The food production of plants and respiration of animals is only peripherally related to global warming. The teabaggers seem to be the exact same group as global warming deniers. Massive gullibility in one seems to lead to massive gullibility in the other.

    Are you serious about the Obama caricature? You need to learn some history.

  9. vjack Says:

    I love it! I’ve been meaning to do something like this with all the pictures and simply haven’t had the time when I remember. But I think you did it better than I would have anyway, so thanks for that.

  10. userjack6880 Says:

    Great use of the photos. I just took a picture of anything interesting. One of the photos in the gallery was about a petition against the national ID card – just to note that they did that there also.

    The event really was about crowd and public participation. Imagine a crowd swooning at every word of a politician claiming that Obama had fake hope, the government is becoming tyrannical, and there is a fight for traditional Christian values in government and education. And in the background, you have the sound of cars passing, honking because the signs asked, and almost nobody speaking out against it.

  11. Angie Jackson Says:

    This post was featured on this week’s Angie the Anti-Theist Sunday School. Keep up the awesomeness!

  12. Jeff Eyges Says:

    I touught they rigged Lake Nyos with some kind of pumping system that lets the CO2 outgass gradually.

    Bacopa, it’s still toxic to these people; mouth-breathing causes them to take in large quantities all at once.

  13. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Plants and animals tell me the earth is warming.

    That is an interesting observation. I should note for those who are global climate change skeptics reading this that although this observation may indeed be a local climatic phenomenon not related to global warming, these kinds of things are happening all around the world. Eventually, with enough local changes, the changes become, by definition, global. I invite the skeptics to do a similar 50 or 100 year ago comparison of their own little neck of the woods and see if they find interesting anecdotes like this.

  14. Parrotlover77 Says:

    One of the photos in the gallery was about a petition against the national ID card – just to note that they did that there also.

    “One of these is not like the other.”

    Isn’t being against a national ID card something that the evil ACLU would spend time and money on? When did that become a “conservative” issue?

  15. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Whether or not that means G-d is left as an exercise to the reader and depends upon your belief system.

    Whenever I see “g-d” i read it as “god damn.”

    CO2 is life-essential for plants and in turn, plants provide oxygen for animals to breathe. It’s all part of the cycle of life that we’ve evolved into. Anyone who doesn’t recognize that is either being intentionally obtuse or didn’t pass primary and school biology classes.

    I’m impressed you were able to put together the above paragraph as it’s much more thought out than most fundie comments.

    That said, it took billions of years for the earth to get to the atmospheric balance we have right now. Pumping extraextra CO2 in the atmosphere doesn’t automtically mean that plants will immediately extract it and convert it to oxygen. That’s the part you got wrong. We are adding more CO2 than naturally occurs from animal life waste and geologic sources.

    In fact, our biosphere has a declining amount of plant life, thanks to human sprawl, logging, and pollution. It hasn’t reached a critical mass yet, but if we don’t do something to stop it very soon, it will.

  16. sue blue Says:

    That’s right – the extra CO2 we’re pumping into the atmosphere is not part of our current carbon cycle. It’s been out of circulation for tens or hundreds of millions of years. Most of these idiots don’t realize how different the earth was back then. They believe that the earth has existed more or less as we know it today, with maybe some “natural” fluctuations allowed by, or controlled by, God. Therefore, CO2 belching out of cars or coal-fired power plants can’t possibly change God’s natural order. Therefore, these weak-minded, lazy asses can continue to do whatever they want without responsibility or accountability – because their God has everything under control.

  17. Marikhen Says:

    This whole “CO2 is life essential” issue is rather interesting. At first my thoughts were along the lines of, “You morons, breathing too much CO2 would kill you, and maybe that’s a good idea.” Then after a bit I remembered that plants do that little thing where they convert CO2 to O2.

    So now I just have to wonder, how long would life on the surface of the planet survive without CO2?

  18. Ron Britton Says:

    Marikhen:

    Plants and animals coevolved, so they’re in balance. If you took away all the CO2, you’d quickly get it back from the respiration of the animals. Then they’d run out of oxygen and die.

    The real problem is when humans mess with that balance and are too stupid to realize it or too selfish to fix it.

    Life on Earth will continue with global warming. We aren’t going to kill ourselves off (that way). However, there will be major disruptions in growing regions, habitat loss, even more extinctions than we’re producing currently, sea level changes, more severe weather, etc.

    Not only will things be less pleasant, all of these changes will cost billions or probably trillions of dollars to cope with. (Not to mention the effects of famines from food shortages.) It’s cheaper (and far less painful) to avert the changes now than to ignore them and deal with them when they occur.

  19. sue blue Says:

    Just a couple of weeks ago, we went through our hottest week in history here in the northwest. Temps at my house topped out at 104 degrees, with nights in the 80s. We also experienced 44 days without rain – smack in the middle of a temperate rain forest that normally gets more than five feet of rain a year. I lost a lot of trees, shrubs and flowers to heat and drought, my vegetable production is piss-poor – and a spring on our property dried up. We’ve lived here 27 years and have never seen anything like this. While this is all anecdotal, I keep wondering how long our food production can keep up nationwide if the irrigation-dependent West loses its snow and glacier-fed river water. Water wars have always been part of the political scene in the West (which grows a huge amount of the world’s food crops). I don’t even want to think about what will happen when it comes down to drinking water or starving.

    So, for those that think climate change will just mean that Canadians can grow pineapples (I’ve actually heard this stupidity expounded by a Southern Representative)let’s just see how much O2 will no longer be produced by plants as huge parts of the country become desert, while industry continues to burn fossil fuel and produce CO2. It might even get too warm for their swamp coolers to keep up.

  20. Jeff Eyges Says:

    While this is all anecdotal, I keep wondering how long our food production can keep up nationwide if the irrigation-dependent West loses its snow and glacier-fed river water.

    Doesn’t matter; we’re screwed anyway. The bees are dying. Seriously.

    So, for those that think climate change will just mean that Canadians can grow pineapples (I’ve actually heard this stupidity expounded by a Southern Representative)

    Wait; it won’t be long until you hear one of them say, “Global warming will be useful in that it will prepare the liberals for hell.” I’m sure they say it privately already.

  21. Brian Says:

    Wait; it won’t be long until you hear one of them say, “Global warming will be useful in that it will prepare the liberals for hell.” I’m sure they say it privately already.

    Sadly, after having to listen to the birthers and the astroturfers, no comment from the right is too stupid for them to not only utter but also believe wholeheartedly. We recently had a visit from my father-in-law’s sister, who is a very nice woman. She is, however, a fundie, and is unsurprisingly opposed to anything President Obama proposes because she’s sure he’s the anti-Christ. I didn’t want to spoil the evening for my wife who hadn’t seen her in several years, but I did ask her where she got all her information, since she held such strong opinions. She gets all of it from her friend, who gets all her information from cluster Fox News. Fearing my head might explode like something out of Scanners if I continued to listen, I passed the evening by myself, marveling (again) at how dumb otherwise intelligent people can be. You’d think I wouldn’t be surprises by now, huh?

  22. sue blue Says:

    I was recently surprised that my sister, an intelligent, highly-educated, world-traveling career woman, is a “birther”. Although she lives in Texas, I had assumed that because of her background and the fact that she lives in fairly cosmopolitan Houston, she’d be immune to teh stupid so rampant elsewhere in the South. Then, during a recent visit, I overheard her telling my mother how nothing Obama did counted, since he wasn’t legitimately elected. When I asked why she thought he hadn’t been “legitimately” elected, she proceeded to elaborate all the conspiracy theories about how he was born in Kenya, had managed to evade investigation, and cover up his past. I was so shocked that she actually believed it that I couldn’t come up with a response. She is not a conservatard fundie by any means. The only explanation I can come up with is that being constantly surrounded by secessionists, racists, megachurch-going fundagelicals and the Bush clan has brainwashed her. Or there are just some retardogenic vapors in the air there, maybe spewing out of the oil refineries along with all the CO2, starving their brains of oxygen.

  23. Parrotlover77 Says:

    I was a part of the “Bush is not MY president” crowd but even though I passionately believe that Mr. Gore was robbed of his rightful 2000 win, I never thought “nothing Bush did counted anyway.” Once the Supreme Court ruled, I recognized that however much I disagreed, that was THE LAW OF THE LAND — end of story.

    That’s a key difference between the radical right and left. The left tries to keep things as close to the law as possible, even when they feel the law has been blatantly violated. The right just throws up their hands and yells “REVOLUTION! WOLVERINES!”

    An aside to this story. On The Ed Show yesterday I heard some conservative ex-congressman (forgot his name) make the famous “but the left is violent too” excuse when talking about the rising violence of the birther/teabagger crowd. His evidence? Some violent anarchist group in the 90s. WTF? How can the left simultaneously be socialist, fascist, and anarchist? Holy crap my brain just exploded! Logic committed suicide after that statement because it was too painful. And the best part is that nobody called him out on it. And this is a “lefty” show on the “lefty” MSNBC.

  24. Jeff Eyges Says:

    PL, I don’t think anyone really understands the difference between leftist politics and anarchism any more – certainly not the talking heads. And the people on the right think all lefties are fascists. Of course, when I say things like “Take away their right to vote!”, it doesn’t help matters any.

    (You really should pretend you don’t know me.)

  25. Brian Says:

    What really scares me is this atmosphere of anger and rage that is being wantonly stirred up by right-wing blowhards who seem oblivious to the violence they are in danger of inciting. It would not surprise me at all if, sometime over the remainder of the Congressional recess, something really bad happens at one of these town brawls. The sheep bringing signs of Obama looking like Hitler and carrying loaded firearms aren’t the sort to value reason over emotion. In the words of Han Solo, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

  26. Jeff Eyges Says:

    I think it probably will degenerate into violence very soon. Perhaps it will be a good thing; it could serve to detract from their credibility, at least in the eyes of those who are sitting on the fence.

    I received this last night in an email from the Environmental Defense Action Fund. Fortunately, most of the comments are negative.

  27. Brian Says:

    Jeff,

    I understand what you’re getting at as far as an act of violence galvanizing reasonable people to say “enough” to the lunatic fringe. However, I really, really hope no one gets hurt over this, no matter who they are or where they stand on the issue.

    Actually, as crazy as the Republicans and their sycophants have been, I place the blame for this fiasco on the Democrats. I credit the president for at least trying to be bipartisan, but a smart person like him really should have known better. No matter what he and the rest of the Democrats do, the GOP will distort it into something akin to the end of the world. They’ve got the numbers to ram through what they know is right, but like typical Democrats, they either lack the spine to do it or they’ve been tainted by the millions of dollars in campaign contributions from the pharmaceutical and insurance industries.

    In an ideal situation, I can envision President Obama doing what he did so well in the campaign – speak directly to people in his uniquely gifted way – while at the same time telling the insane minority trying to torpedo the whole thing to stand aside, we’re doing meaningful reform and if you don’t like it, go to hell. Then, perhaps, he can make sure Congress actually passes this thing. But he seems to have this deer-in-the-headlights look in the face of all this, at least for now. I hope he gets it in gear soon.

  28. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Jeff – Who are you? I don’t know you.

    Anyway, with the possible exception of you, modern leftist politics is about as far from anarchism as possible. Lefties do, yes, want “more government” to borrow a rather silly glib term. The screams of “socialist” are far more plausible than anarchist. It’s like calling Rush Limbaugh a Communist!

    I agree with Brian regarding the violence. You may not have meant it this way, but it’s too frighteningly close to RushCo’s hope for another 9/11 type event on Obama’s watch so they can rally everybody behind right wingers in a big “I told ya so” moment that the media will happily eat up and regurgitate. But aside from that, I just flat out don’t want anybody to get hurt. I want our side to be above that, even if it means we get beat up on by irrational people sometimes.

    Brian – I also blame the Dems, but in a different way than you. I think if it weren’t for the @$#@!$! blue dogs, what you mention might have actually happened after a true honest “bipartisan” effort was made. But, remember we don’t really have the votes to ram anything through thanks to the blue dogs. The key is electing better liberals in the primaries. We got a good start — better than in decades — but it’s still going to be a long road before we have as per capita effective of a Democratic Party as the Republican Party is, even in it’s most powerless state in a very long time.

  29. Jeff Eyges Says:

    Yeah, it is a tough call. I don’t know if it’s an attempt to be bipartisan, or if all of the Dems really aren’t on board, any given number having been bought off by the health care industry. I’d like to think he’s doing it because he believes that if he goes about this like a gentleman, the opposition will come around.

    The whole thing just sucks.

  30. Brian Says:

    What really drives me nuts is how the insanity is winning. How stupid are we, really? So now they’re supposedly dropping the provision to compensate you for end-of-life planning with your doctor because of the whole “death panel” misperception. Jesus fucking Christ. Grow a set of balls, stand up to the imbeciles and do this thing right, or prepare to be replaced with someone else next year.

  31. Jeff Eyges Says:

    Anyway, with the possible exception of you, modern leftist politics is about as far from anarchism as possible.

    PL, I’m not an anarchist! I’m an old-fashioned leftie; in fact, I’m pretty much a socialist. Ideally, I’d like more government, not less (although we don’t seem to do that well here, either).

    As I said, I don’t think most people know the difference, and the Right thinks anyone left of center is like Boris Badenov, running around with a bomb, trying to blow up “Moose and Squirrel”!

  32. Jeff Eyges Says:

    The key is electing better liberals in the primaries.

    Jesus! Do we have any? I thought this was about the best we could do.

    As Bill Maher said recently, “Socialist? Obama isn’t a socialist; he isn’t even a liberal!”

  33. Parrotlover77 Says:

    Jesus! Do we have any? I thought this was about the best we could do.

    The Progressive Caucus (who, incidentally, has been fighting tooth and nail for true health care reform, despite media attention focusing on the fake grassroots movement) is the largest caucus in Congress. Yup. They are out there. They are fighting hard. But you only get media attention when you aren’t dirty fucking hippies. Basically, the blue dogs get all the media attention because they are The One And True Way Of Centrism.

    As Bill Maher said recently, “Socialist? Obama isn’t a socialist; he isn’t even a liberal!”

    The one good thing is that the word “socialism” no longer has a negative sting on the younger. The more the right yells “socialist” the more the next generation says, hey I like Obama, I must be down with socialism! And that’s good for any lefty.

  34. Futanari Says:

    I’m surprised they didn’t use “cuntstitution.”

  35. Smallfry Says:

    I just recently found this online. I’m sure it’s old news to you’ens, but I found it enraging.

    http://youtu.be/GO_WC0FINmA