Note to Jim Bob: They Sell These Things Called “Condoms” — Buy Some!

Almost everyone in this picture came out of Michelle Duggar's vagina. Believe it or not!

I stumbled across the above image on the Flickr page of a guy named neilcato. The caption is very funny. The story behind the image is not.

The Flickr page links to a funny column from 2005 by Mark Morford that tells the appalling story of the Duggar family of Arkansas. Yes, they’re fundies. That’s them above. Yes, they have 16 kids. No, they’re not stopping. They say they want more. Mr. Duggar is appropriately named Jim Bob. I would guess that he likes having sex.

The Mark Morford column includes a couple of photographs of what was probably a very happy and special event — the first ten or twelve times!

Doesn't having that many people in the room violate fire codes?

Morford’s caption is brilliant:

Here they are, the Duggar children and their father Jim Bob Duggar (top center), as their mother Michelle holds the 16th addition to the family. While the birth was successful, doctors were unable to remove the large feral monster squirrel growing from the back of Michelle’s head. Nor were they able to convince any of the daughters that bad Amish-style haircuts actually make God cry.

The happy couple with the new baby.

Morford’s caption reads:

It is not for you to imagine this couple’s physical gyrations. It is not for you to wonder, after giving birth to 16—yes 16—children in a mere 19 years, what this woman’s body must be like, what this man’s weird motivations must be. It is perhaps enough for us to wonder at their infinitely distressing hair, their 16 gleaming white Christian fundamentalist children, and to cry to the gods, why, why, WHY?

You should stroll on over and read the rest of Morford’s column. It’s funny in a sad way, or sad in a funny way. Or something. Here are a couple of excerpts:

Perhaps this [is] the scariest aspect of our squishy birthin’ tale: Maybe the scales are tipping to the neoconservative, homogenous right in our culture simply because they tend not to give much of a damn for the ramifications of wanton breeding and environmental destruction and pious sanctimony, whereas those on the left actually seem to give a whit for the health of the planet and the dire effects of overpopulation.

and…

We are burning through the planet’s resources faster than a Republican can eat an endangered caribou stew. Note to Michelle Duggar: If God wanted you to have a massive pile of children, she’d have given your uterus a hydraulic pump and a revolving door. Stop it now.

5 Responses to “Note to Jim Bob: They Sell These Things Called “Condoms” — Buy Some!”

  1. The Watcher Says:

    The article makes fun of the girls’ hair, but not their outfits. Ye gads, do they shop exclusively at the Laura Ingalls Wilder store?

  2. Jalestra Says:

    Ok, I’ve had 4, so maybe I have no room to talk, but I’m not sure whether to fall down in admiration or be sickened. It takes one hell of a woman or one hell of an idiot to have 17 kids….You know why her hair is like that? Who the hell has time to fix it???? I don’t even have time half the time to PEE lol

  3. Saros Says:

    Wrong… so wrong. People like that disgust me.

  4. Joe Says:

    I was in Rogers, AK at the beginning of February for work. This family’s address is in Spingdale which is South about 10 miles. If I had known this I would have called up to ask for a personal viewing of the “FREAKSHOW”.

    What does this guy do to support this family? I think it’s child abuse.

  5. neilcato Says:

    Every so often, I google my name, or my primary user name, neilcato, just to see what it turns up. This was a funny surprise! Nice to see someone was checking out my flickr page!