Fundies Demand Special Super Bowl Privileges

Fundies are always complaining that gays want “special privileges” (i.e., equal rights). Now, the fundies are demanding special privileges for themselves (i.e., privileges not granted to other people).

The latest crap from Tony Perkins of the Fundie Research Council is titled NFL Stops Forward Progress of Church Party

Fall Creek Baptist Church logo

Are you ready for some football? The Fall Creek Baptist Church of Indianapolis was, until attorneys from the National Football League (NFL) learned of their plans to throw a congregation-wide Super Bowl party. The Indianapolis Star reports that Pastor John Newland received a letter, overnighted from the NFL, demanding that the party be cancelled because it violates “copyright laws” to project the game on a television screen larger than 55 inches.

Why is “copyright laws” in quotes? Perkins doesn’t believe in copyright? Or is it because churches are exempt from paying taxes, now they want to be exempt from all other laws too? I can only speculate. If the law applies to everyone else, why not them?

But what’s truly troubling is that NFL headquarters also sacked the church’s plans to show a video highlighting the Christian testimonies of coaches Tony Dungy and Lovie Smith. Assistant Counsel Rachel Margolies writes, “[The NFL] is consistent in refusing the use of our game broadcasts in connections with events that promote a message, no matter the content.”

The NFL isn’t telling them they can’t show their Dungy-Lovie video. The NFL is only telling them that they can’t use the Super Bowl broadcast as a lure to get people to listen to preaching. If a real estate developer used the Super Bowl as a lure to entrap people in a time-share presentation, the NFL would block that, too. The broadcast is the NFL’s intellectual property. They have a right (fundies have trouble with the concept of rights) to determine how it is used.

This is an interesting contradiction, since the League allows businesses such as sports bars to broadcast the game to crowds in an environment that encourages alcohol consumption.

First of all, if the bars’ TVs are less than 55 inches, there’s no violation of copyright law. Second, the broadcast isn’t tied to a specific message. Showing the broadcast on a small screen inside a church building without any preaching would be allowed. Showing it on a giant screen as part of a revival meeting is a violation.

Obviously, the NFL is more comfortable promoting substance abuse and half-time nudity than it is endorsing positive role models like Dungy and Smith.

No, it’s not obvious. Stop making ridiculous assertions. The half-time nudity crack is also baseless. They still haven’t gotten over the trauma to their little brains from having seen Janet Jackson’s nipple for two seconds. The NFL and CBS did not know that would occur, nor did they have a reasonable expectation that it would occur.

I do agree with his remark about promoting substance abuse. Sporting events make huge amounts of money from beer ads, which glamorize drug use (merely stating “please drink responsibly” in tiny print or quick, hushed tones does little to counter the much larger message of how fun alcohol abuse is).

Rather than provide a safe, healthy environment for families to gather and watch the Super Bowl, the NFL is suggesting that they abandon the church for the nearest bar.

No they’re not! Children aren’t allowed in bars, and Perkins knows it. His diatribes are always full of these rhetorical misdirections, designed to whip up the emotions of his mindless flock.

Attorneys at the NFL should concentrate less on intimidating churches and more on preventing another “wardrobe malfunction.”

And he brings it up again! Stop obsessing over Janet Jackson’s nipple, Tony! You can’t have it!

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